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I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: mascara

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs March 2019

Welcome to the first Likes/Dislikes post of 2019! For anyone new, this is a post where I sing the praises, or bitch like a curmudgeonly old biddy, about products I’ve tried over the past few months. The categories are: Panty Droppers, Mehs, and Go Fuck Yourselves.


PDs

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The Potion Cabinet Shower Gel (Witch’s Cold Brew): This is an Etsy story that offers bath products, collectibles, and more. This scent is listed as: a warm cup of espresso, cocoa bean, steamed milk and vanilla chai topped with whipped cream and a touch of rum. Mostly, I only smelled the vanilla and rum, maybe a little bit of the cocoa. IT WAS HEAVENLY. I like the gel itself - leaves my skin soft and the scent doesn’t linger, which I prefer.

Merchant of Gallifry Roll-on Fragrance: Another Etsy store (yes, I’m addicted) but it looks like they don’t make perfumes anymore. There is a bunch of scented stuff, though. Loved this perfume. I believe the notes were mango and rose but I couldn’t necessarily pick out either. They melded together wonderfully for a very unique scent.

Milani Retouch and Erase Light-Lifting Concealer: I haven’t used this up, but it’s really old, and I think it’s starting to turn. It’s a fantastic concealer for me. My under eyes are much dryer now than when I was younger, and this is one of the only concealers that doesn’t look like total shit on me. Will be repurchasing.

Carol’s Daughter Frappe Body Lotion (Almond Cookie): I’ve used Carol’s Daughter’s hair products before (which SUCK ASS) so I almost didn’t get this. I needed a body lotion that worked better than what I already had (see the MEHs section below) and the scent on this is fantastic! Smells like straight up, fresh baked almond cookies. And the lotion is nice and thick, but absorbs quickly and lasts a long time. Highly recommend!!


MEHs

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PUR Fully Charged Magnetic Mascara: This does give good volume, but no length, so my lashes look stubby. It’s a great layering mascara, though! Not sure how it’s anti-aging…what the fuck? Who believes that kind of shit?

Flower Beauty Light Illusion Full Coverage Concealer: While this is a good shade (it’s just about the same color as my skin so it blends in well) and it’s lightweight, it’s definitely not full coverage. It’s also not crease-proof, looks SUPER dry under my eyes and anywhere I use it to cover blemishes or spots.

Everyone Body Lotion (Lavender & Aloe): While the scent on this is really nice (great to use before bedtime,) it doesn’t seem to really moisturize my skin. Absorbs fast - or maybe it just poofs off into the ether - because my skin doesn’t fell any different after using it. It also says you can use it for face, hands, and body. Um…no. No, you can’t. This is NOT good for the face.

GFYs

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Colourpop BFF Mascara: Now, anyone who’s been here a while, knows I love Colourpop. I did a whole review on a bunch of products HERE. So when they came out with mascaras, I was pumped. I got a red and black one (so far, I don’t know of any other brand that makes a red mascara.) I can only speak to the red for this review because I tried that and REFUSE TO EVEN LOOK AT THE BLACK. This shit fucked up my eyes for two days. They itched, swelled up (not to the point of impairing my vision, though), and produced excessive amounts of goop. Fucking what the fuck, Colourpop? People were reviewing this like it was the Second Cumming of Christ, and even if it wasn’t for my bad reaction, the mascara itself is pretty lame. Doesn’t volumize or lengthen or ANYTHING. Fucking useless shite.

Joah Eye Scream Volume & Lengthening Mascara: I’ve only tried a couple of products from Joah (lipstick, eyebrow pencil, and this - I think.) It’s a hit and miss brand, but this stuff was HORRIBLE. It’s a fiber mascara that does ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for the lashes. However, it DOES get onto your eyeballs and poke the fucking shit out of them. Eye Scream is a pretty accurate description. So…there’s that. Fuck you, Joah.

That’s it for this (what I hope will be) quarterly report of awesome and suckage. See you next time!

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs 2018 Year End

Again…gah. I haven’t done one of these for MONTHS, but I hope to get back into a regular schedule for 2019. For those who are new, instead of doing the generic “Likes and Dislikes” or “Fails and Favorites,” I call my list of crap I liked and hated as “Panty Droppers, Mehs, and Go Fuck Yourselves.”

Enjoy.

PDs

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Tarte Rainforest of the Sea Foundation: I don’t usually spend my money on high-end makeup. Tarte is the exception. I prefer light coverage foundations, if I wear them at all, and this is perfection. It lasts all day on me and looks as good at the end of the day, as it did after first application. I had to get a new bottle, though, because my previous one expired before I could use it up. Right now I have Fair-Light Neutral, but I probably could switch to Fair Beige (they came out with a few new shades since I first bought it.)

Stila Huge Extreme Lash Mascara: I got this as a sample in one of my Ulta orders this year. And I didn’t want to like it because Stila is one of those high-end brands. But DAMMIT! This stuff makes my lashes look long, thick (rowr) and gorgeous.

A’Pieu Finger Blusher: This came in a 3B subscription bag (aaaaaages ago.) I can’t believe how long it lasted. The smell just started to go off, so I had to toss it. But if I can find this again, I would repurchase. Perfect cream blush - blends out beautifully, and the peach shade I had was very natural. One of the best blushers I’ve ever used. I don’t think they make it anymore, but YesStyle has a ton of A’Pieu products, so maybe one of the blushes in there will work as well…?

Lunatik Cosmetic Labs Lipstick in Lacrimosa: This has been one of my favorite shades of lipstick in a long time. The description from their website: Lacrimosa is a translucent shade with a pink hue packed with a kaleidoscope of color shifting sparkles. I got it back in 2014, I think, at a convention. Unfortunately, the bullet completely dried up and it’s now impossible to get any pigment out of it. Which makes me incredibly sad. So I guess I’ll have to go get another one!

I forgot to include these babies in the PDs pic above, so they’ll get special treatment. I know a lot of people don’t like the metallic lip look, because it makes the lips appear older/aged. Personally, I don’t care. I love how shiny the Metal Shock is (shade: Mercury,) and the Vibrant Shock (shade: Nightstalker) is just a gorgeous shock of color. Obvi.

The Vibrant Shock seems a teeny streaky at first, but you can definitely work with it to look just fine on the lips. These do dry down, but don’t become transfer proof. They’re just a titch sticky, but not the “sweet baby Jesus it’s gonna be 10 minutes before my lips separate!” kind of sticky.

MEHs

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Wet n Wild Tour & Tease Lip Balm: It’s a nice soft wash of color, but sooooo drying. This might be one of those multi-use products (lips and cheeks) and, if so, that explains the dryness. Never has any dual product felt nice on either part of the face. Blech.

The Ordinary Serum Foundation: I love the thin consistency and light coverage; the shade is pretty good, too. But it makes my skin look like a 4000-year old papyrus notebook found in some Egyptian angsty teenager’s sarcophagus. Ugh.

BH Cosmetics Naturally Flawless Foundation: Really good coverage and a nice shade. But, again, makes my skin look super dry, and my pores appear the size of Iowa. Ah….no thanks.

Catrice Glam and Doll False Lashes Waterproof Mascara: I wanted to try the waterproof version of this because the regular version makes my lashes so long, the product transfers all over the damn place. This isn’t quite that good, PLUS it’s nearly impossible to remove. Hence, the reason I rarely wear waterproof makeup.

Essence Lash Princess Sculpted Volume Mascara: I love the original one (pink details) but this was just okay. The real problem is that it’s thick and gloopy, and never really dries out enough to be more controllable. Too bad.

GFYs

Notoriously Morbid Jinxed Jewels Liquid Eyeshadow in Tempting Devils: I got this little guy in the NM Halloween Advent Calendar. This shit is terrible. They say it can be worn on its own, layered, or over an eye shadow. I tried both, and it looked like hammered shit both times. Completely creased and crumbled off my eye after a few hours. I tried it more than once, just in case I layered it too heavily or not enough. Nope. Fucking awful product. (This is not for individual sale on the site.)

Notoriously Morbid Cosmic Gloss in Brooding Vampires: I’m specifically talking about the Brooding Vampires shade, which I also got in the Advent Calendar (I only took the pic of it with the Smoke & Fire shade to compare they came in the same full size container, but sure as FUCK don’t contain the same amount of product. The sticker may say 2 mls, but you can clearly see the base of the twist up tube is much higher on BV than on S&F. I only twisted the BV tube enough to get the product out - I haven’t worn this shade at all.) Brooding Vampires just came out of the tube as slightly tinted gloop. It never mixed with the base oils so I really don’t know what color this is supposed to be. Weak, and a little shifty on the packaging, NM. (For some reason, there are no links to get their Cosmic Gloss on the site - not sure what’s up with that because the Smoke & Fire shade is phenomenal.)

Tarte Aqua Concealer: Imagine my surprise when the concealer, in the same line as the foundation I love, makes my under eyes look dryer than a dust covered shelf in a long abandoned castle from the 18th century. Fuck you, Aqua concealer, you lying bitch.

Colourpop No Filter Concealer: See above, sans the corresponding foundation comment. (Full disclosure: I could have sworn they had regular and matte concealer, but all that’s listed on the site is matte - so that would explain the dryness.)

RK Extend Illusion Mascara: At first, I kind of liked this. But the more I wore it, the more I realized it was a tubing mascara, and those little fuckers shed INTO MY EYE BALLS. Fuck that noise. (I can’t find any place that sells this now so…there you go.)

NYX Matte Lip Cream (Moscow): I normally love these, but this particular color is patchy, hard to work with, and gets crumbly as it dries. Which explains why it’s not even for sale on the NYX website. At least they recognize when something sucks.

NYX Strictly Vinyl Liquid Eye Liners: So disappointed in this. I used the red shade once, and it was pretty cool. A few months later, went to use it again, and it was completely dried out. I bought a new bottle, the brown shade this time, and it was almost all dried up when I used it for the first time. Da fuck, NYX?

Catrice HD Liquid Coverage Precision Concealer: You know what this shit covers? Abso-fucking-lutely NADA. I appreciate the applicator design. I need to put concealer in a small, specific spot under my eyes or it becomes a shit show real fast. However, this all just blended away, but it left enough product behind to make my under eyes look like the Sahara. Fuck off, Catrice, you hit-but-mostly-miss beeyotch.

That’s it for 2018! See you on the other side, Ray.

RK Makeup by Kiss Review

I wasn't planning to write up this review, rather post a couple pics of a new brand of makeup I saw at CVS. But here I am, a dozen pictures later and doing research on this company.

(NOT SPONSORED, I PAID FOR EVERYTHING I'M REVIEWING)

RK by Kiss

KISS appears to be mainly a nail care manufacture but they sell a few different brands under their umbrella. This is the main gist from their website, kissusa.com:

Kiss is the world's largest manufacturer and distributor of professional quality nail products. The company originated in the lucrative beauty supply market. As the popularity of the products soared, distribution was quickly expanded to the mass-market arena from Walgreens to WalMart. Capitalizing on this success, Kiss became the first company to bring quality, professional nail care directly to the consumer, creating easy-to-use, all-in-one kits so she can achieve Salon Results at home. Today, the Kiss line of products has expanded to include nail care, nail jewelry, nail art, and manicure & pedicure tools. Each of these quality products originated from Kiss's innovative thinking and vast salon experience. 

Kiss does have links for the brands they sell so I headed on over to RK, or Ruby Kisses. Not much really in the way of information on them, though. From their site, rubykissescosmetics.com:

Our passion lies in not only enhancing a woman's individual appearance, but to deliver quality products at affordable prices. We take great pride in being able to provide a wide range of colors cosmetics to women of all shades and ethnicities.

I have an app on my phone that will scan the bar code of any product and tell me if the company is cruelty free or not. The app gave me the all clear, though the brand is still on the "pending" list at Logical Harmony (which basically means the company hasn't responded to inquiries yet). So for now we'll go with "it's possible!"

The RK site doesn't list the lipstick, mascara, OR eye shadow palette I bought at CVS (rather peculiar but may be exclusive to in-store purchase only). So I really just don't know what the hell is going on with this brand. They are SUPER inexpensive products so could be trying to give Wet n Wild a run for its money (and their prices have begun to climb - not all but $9 for a foundation that's half the weight of a standard bottle is high for them).

I've tried all three products so I can at least give you my first impressions of them. 

EYE SHADOW PALETTE - Break of Dawn (Dear Diary Series, whatever that means)

This is a very soft-toned, neutral palette. I think it even says on the back that these are for creating every day, natural looks. And I would agree with that. I feel that I could intensify the darker shades with a dark sticky base. I'll have to experiment with that. 

You can see from the second image that after just doing a few finger swatches the pans already show some wear. The shadows are very powdery but that doesn't necessarily translate to good pigment. The hand swatch shows they don't have much color payoff but you can't always tell how well a shadow will perform from swatches, though again, I believe they're meant for softer eye looks.

The fourth picture is what the palette looked like after I did my eye makeup. There is powder fall out errwhere. The shimmery lid shades I used dropped glitter all over the place, too. They were small bits, like micro glitter, but very hard to remove. I highly recommend shadow shields, a shit ton of powder under the eyes that will catch the glitter then you can wipe it away, or maybe some glitter glue. I put yellow dots on the colors I used:

2nd row, middle shade (matte light tan): crease.

1st row, middle shade (light peach w/white glitter): eyelid

3rd row, third shade (white w/white glitter) THEN first shade (deeper pink w/white glitter): eyelid, over the original peach shade because it hardly showed up even after wetting my brush, which did help but not much. Then that white glittery shade completely wiped off so I used the deeper pink shade.

4th row, middle shade (satin reddish-dark brown): outer corner, crease. This shade worked the best so far.

1st row, first shade (matte cream): under brow bone

The end look is super pretty, very soft, and I guess what would be called 'romantic' because of the pink and peach tones. I want to work with it more, try some glitter glue or wet bases to help with pigmentation and fall out.

The packaging is plastic but feels pretty sturdy. In fact, it snaps closed so well that I struggled to open it back up! Each pan holds .035 ounces of product for a total of .42 ounces. There are 2 matte shades, 5 satins, and 5 glitters (other 12 pan palettes I found vary from .3 to .6 ounces and cost anywhere from $7 to $55). This palette was $2.99.

 

EXTEND ILLUSION FIBER MASCARA - Black

I don't think I realized this was one of those fiber mascaras, which I've never used before (that I can remember). It could be what's making my eyes feel gritty right now...or all the damn glitter from the shadow. But I love trying new mascaras so I figured what the hell.

It feels pretty dry right out of the tube but sometimes mascaras take a few uses to loosen up. I love the bristle brush though I prefer a more tapered end, not the blunt cut of the inner wire to be poking out. You can see the fibers in the close up pics, too. Looks kinda funky, right?

It definitely lengthens my lashes. I have slightly long and curled lashes to start but this shit sends them up to my brows! We'll have to see if there's transfer, which is what the Catrice Glam and Doll mascara did. But for a first time use, I really like it. I prefer a more natural look as opposed to the false lash effect or clumpy spidery lashes.

The packaging is plastic and really lightweight. Feels kind of cheap. You get .5 ounces of product in the tube. A lot of mascaras average .24 (the more expensive ones) to .44 (drugstore brands). This cost me $3.99.

 

FOREVER MATTE LIQUID LIPSTICK - Wild Fire

I couldn't test the long-term wear of this product but I just had to know how it looked and performed when eating. This probably sounds tiresome to those who know me but my Invisalign trays fuck up all my lipstick metrics. Even ones that don't get all over my teeth get over my trays so it's really hard to judge all aspects of them. So I stopped wearing lipstick until I'm done with the trays (which should be in a month or so!!!!). I knew I was about to eat breakfast so I thought, let's get this baby on my lips and see what happens.

Might be me but does the packaging on this look like it's going for a Kylie Cosmetics vibe with the drips...? I couldn't possibly care less about the Kardashian family and their beauty products but I'd hate to see another brand get in trouble for copying.

First off, it's a thin formula but not watery. It eventually dries completely but it gives you some time to play and move it around (in case you mess up or go outside the lip line or whatever) which I appreciate! I only had it on for about 10 minutes before eating and it felt comfortable, didn't transfer, and looked beautiful. It started out more tomato red (that little hint of orange which I don't like that much) but it dried down a touch darker and looked more like a true red.

As soon as my lips got wet, the product stared to come off. Mostly the inner rim of both lips, more so on the bottom. It got all over my bagel and the coffee cup but MIRACULOUSLY didn't get all over my face. I only dabbed at my lips once while eating and I expected there to be lipstick all over my chin, under my nose, on the sides of my mouth. NOPE. And I put A LOT of butter on my bagel.

Damn that sounds dirty...

Anyway, I put on another layer just to see how it would work before taking it off. Layered just fine. Didn't get thick or crumbly at all. It was a bitch to remove, though, which makes sense since a lot of it didn't come off with eating. I have to say I'm impressed for something that only costs $1.99.

The packaging is plastic, feels lightweight but not cheap. I love the rose gold accents. Comes with .1 ounces of product (a lot of other brands on the market vary from .07 to .26, both high end and drugstore pricing).

I have to say I had fun with my new discovery. I look forward to playing with these a bit more and get a better feel for them. They sell a lot of different products so I'm interested to see what else could be a new favorite. For anyone just learning about makeup or who doesn't want to spend a fuck ton of cash on a new brand, RK could be your go-to. Which ones do you want to try? (Check for them at CVS, Ebay, Amazon, Target - those are the places I found listed on-line)

 

Ipsy February 2018

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription service. For $10 you get 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full sized) makeup, skin care, and hair care products, as well as a reusable makeup bag. Check them out for yourself here: IPSY

(I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

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The theme this month is "Unzipped". I think that's in reference to being naked (not necessarily physically) or our true form or WHO THE FUCKING JESUS GOD CARES? The bag is pretty cute so I'm hanging on to it for now. Let's get to the products.

PUR Fully Charged Mascara: I haven't tried this yet because I'm trying to Project Pan another mascara (plus I have another one from Catrice that's open). But the reviews look good. I love trying new mascaras. Full size is 15mls for $22, so this 4 mls mini is around $5.50. (CF)

Beaute Basics Eye Shadow in "Lavish": While this shadow is described as a warm, shimmery bronze, it looks more coppery on my skin. Which is fine because I'm sick of bronze shades. It's very soft so can kick up some powder but the pigmentation is nice. Haven't tried it on my eyes yet, though. This looks like a full sized pan (4g) and goes for $15 on the BB site. (NCF - so I'll probably donate it)

Mellow Cosmetics Liquid Precision Pen Eyeliner: I haven't tried this on my eyes, either, but the swatch looks nice and black! It didn't smudge after it dried, unless I put water on it. Pens can be a little tricky to work with as they can dry out fast or get covered in eye shadow and not work as effectively. This also looks full size and goes for $14. (CF)

Luxie Beauty Blending and Shading Eye Brush 249: I love getting brushes and I've enjoyed every Luxie Beauty one I've received. They are super soft but not flimsy. Since it's double sided, it's not available on Ipsy or LB's site (naturally). But it looks like a combo between the precision shader ($14) and the tapered blending ($12) brushes. So let's average that to a $13 value. (CF) 

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Sand & Sky Pink Clay Mask: Now this stuff can go fuck right the fuck off. First of all, look at that picture. If you're gonna skimp on a sample then don't put it in a tube 4-times the size you need, asshats. Also, the package said it contains .45 ounces of product (the Ipsy site says .5). I cut that sucker open and weighed it. There was somewhere between .38 and .40 ounces (I used a titch on my face before it caught fire and I had to remove it, and whatever was left in the tube that I couldn't scrape out, which wouldn't be usable product anyway). I don't know how much is in a full sized jar but it goes for $49. I'd say this sample is worth $1, if even that much. (CF)

Overall, the value is around $47 (I'm not counting the clay mask because fuck that shit). So even without that this ain't too bad!

Medusa's Makeup October/November 2017 Reviews

Like I said in my other posts, October is just one of those months that is jam packed with stuff to do so my reviews took to the back burner. But I'm back and I'll do a double month review for MM.

For those who don't know, Medusa's Makeup is a monthly subscription service. For $16 you get 3-5 full sized makeup products. Check them out here: MEDUSA'S MAKEUP

(I purchase this with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

 

OCTOBER

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MM always includes a pamphlet of all their products and a price/info card. THANK YOU!

Metal AF Lip Gloss (Kiss Me Deadly): I have to say, at first, I was disappointed to see another Metal AF product. The first one I got was terrible. But that is not the case here. The color is GORGEOUS and it doesn't look patchy at all. Super happy with this one. $11

Witch Lash Mascara: I so wanted to try their mascara and was hoping I'd get one this month. And I did. While on its own, it really doesn't do much (lengthens a wee bit, separates the lashes nicely), when combined with other mascaras it's fucking sweet. It also has a side benefit - it keeps other mascaras from transferring onto my brow bone, like the Catrice Glam and Doll mascara. I know, right? So I might need to keep a tube or two in my collection at all times. $12 

Glitter (Ziggy): Oh no. Another glitter. And this is just as meh as all the others. Can't get an even coating of the stuff to save my ass. $8

Eye Dust (Night Owl): I adore their eye dusts, and I love the new packaging, but this one was rather dull. It looks like a smokey purple shadow with a bunch of glitter mixed in. Nothing like the pigmented products I've received in the past. *sad trombone* $10

This $41 valued bag was just okay. More often than not I only end up liking half the products. So I think I might just get through December and call it quits, unless something spectacular happens in November's bag.

 

NOVEMBER

A face mask? HELL YEAH!

A face mask? HELL YEAH!

Again, I'm a little disappointed this month. Also didn't get a pamphlet this time. Huh.

SpaLife Energizing Face Mask: I just love face masks so I'm excited about this. I bet it smells amazing! $3.50

Eye Dust in Karma Chameleon: It looks like it's a brick red or rusty red color with some blue sparkle that makes it come off a little magenta. Sadly, it's basically glitter with some reddish pigment thrown in. I swatched it dry and over the glitter adhesive to see if that would help. Not really. $10 (all their eye dusts online say $8 so I guess the extra $2 is for all the glitter)

I just want to show you some comparison swatches. The top 4 are the first ones I received from MM. The bottom 2 are the last ones I got in the past 2 bags. You can see the pigment is just not there and it's been replaced with glitter. There is some teeny tiny glitters in the first 4 but they're so miniscule that they're hardly noticeable.

The Fix Glitter Adhesive: This stuff feels exactly like their shadow primer and that stuff was useless on me. So I can't imagine this will work any better. But I'll give it a shot. $9

Blush (Sex on the Peach): Holy crap this is beautiful. It's very very VERY shiny so I might use it as a blush topper or an eye shadow as opposed to straight up blush. But it is gorgeous! $12

Just wanted to show a side by side comparison to the pressed blush that I got in my first MM bag. That doesn't come off as pigmented right out of the pan but then it's pressed where this new blush is a loose powder. Both are beautiful.

Like I said, not too thrilled this month, though $34.50 is a decent value. So I think I'm gonna play it out through December then quit. I have quite a bit of MM products that I've kept and I love. And who's to say the stuff that didn't work for me won't work for you? Check them out and see what you think!

Morgue Drawer November 2017

Well...shit. I was going to try and stay on top of these better (heh) but with rental season at the hubby's store and October/Halloween and excuses and reasons and what not. Hopefully I'll be more regular (insert poop joke here) with these in the future. I definitely have some double-up subscription reviews coming! But for now, let's take a look at my garbage.

Not Much Pretty Going On

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ELF Make-up Wipes: I've been buying these for a long time because they're very inexpensive. I don't use them on my face but for swatches when I'm testing something out or taking pics. But even as cheap as they are, I was going through them really fast. So I decided to switch over to a giant pack of baby wipes instead. I'll let you know how those work!

Everyone Face Wipes: Just wanted to try a different brand. These were not that great. Kinda dry and not worth the $6.

Beauty 360 Micellar Water: The only micellar water that's worked great is the Garnier brand. But it's not cruelty free so I've been looking for an alternative. This is not it. Does an okay job but leaves eye makeup behind and it can sting a little if you get too much in your eye. *sigh* Trying another brand now so I'll update you later.

Catrice Glamour Doll Volume Mascara: Though it says volume on it, it didn't do that great of a job in that department. Was nice for separating the lashes but that's about it.

Crazy Rumours Mint Chocolate Lip Balm: I loved this one. The banana flavor wasn't so great but this was fantastic. Smooth, hung around for a while, did a nice job of moisturizing. 

Real Techniques Lash/Brow Groomer: This was my second one. The first I had for years before it started to shed the metal tines. This one lasted a few months. What the hell? I did get another one and it's holding up very well. I think I just got a dud. It happens. I know there are plastic ones out there but I prefer the metal. Does a much better job of separating clumped lashes.

 

So Soft and Smooth

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Tarte Deep Dive Cleansing Gel: I got a sample of this a while back and decided to get a full size (though it is the smaller bottle of the two available). It did make my skin feel baby smooth and cleaned it well. After a while it didn't feel the same and it may have stopped working. Not a problem because I didn't want to spend the $$ on another bottle anyway. But it was a nice change.

Tarte Maracuja C-Brighter Eye Treatment: Nothing special but it was nice enough. My dry patch didn't come back while using this so that's a plus!

The Ordinary "Buffet" Serum: Best thing I've tried from this line so far. I know I don't eat well so since I can't nourish my skin from the inside sufficiently, might as well do it from the outside! I only use 2 drops per use. A little goes a long way so the bottle lasts a while. And this is actually one of the more expensive items in their inventory - at $14. I think I'm on my fourth or fifth bottle already. Love it.

The Ordinary Rose Hip See Oil: I really loved this for some extra moisture in the winter time. But the product started to smell funny when I got about 2/3 of the way through the bottle. I didn't use it every day so maybe if I did, I would have finished it off before it started to turn. Might just purchase this during the winter time. And for rose hip oil, it's super cheap but it's really good.

The Ordinary 2% Rentinoid Emulsion: This is a gentler form of retinol so it does the same work (reduce wrinkles, helps with skin cell turnover) but it's just a little slower and much more gentle than the regular retinol you get in the drug store. But, as my former piano teacher said, once you're on this stuff you have to STAY on it. Fuck that noise. It's not expensive through The Ordinary but I just don't want to mess with it any more.

Air Repair Complexion Boosting Moisturizer: This was a really nice face cream. I used it at night, though, as it was heavier than I prefer for the day time.

Soap & Glory Peaches and Clean Cream Cleanser: The bottle says it removes makeup but every reviewer I've watched says it doesn't. I don't use it for that anyway. I use it as a regular cream cleanser in the morning. It's a nice gentle cleanser that works great. I'm already on my second bottle.

Shiny Hair, Shiny Teeth

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Batiste Original Dry Shampoo: The scent is really nice on this one. But the powder is REALLY white. Make sure you work it in well! There's mixed info out there about this brand being Cruelty Free so I won't buy it again.

Hask Oil Absorbing Dry Shampoo: I enjoyed this one a lot. No white powder or residue but it feels more like a texturizing spray as opposed to a dry shampoo. It works very well though.

Marc Anthony Argan Oil of Morocco Hair Spray: I've been buying this for years. Soft hold, not super sticky, doesn't make my hair crunchy. But it's also not a super strong holding spray so keep that in mind. Smell is amazing.

Attitude Shampoo/Body Wash: This was fine. Felt like a clarifying shampoo, if you know what I'm mean. Hair was super dooper clean afterwards. I just don't like multi-purpose hair/body stuff. Usually very drying.

Tom's of Main Maximum Strength Sensitive Toothpaste: This is my preferred toothpaste. It helps with sensitivity, it doesn't make the inside of my mouth peel (sensitivity pastes do that to about 5% of us weirdos), and it's got fluoride. Not sure if I still NEED fluoride but my teeth are super prone to cavities so I'd rather not take the chance. Trouble is I only ever see this at The Vitamin Shoppe or sometimes health food stores. Dammit.

Tom's of Main Rapid Relief Sensitive Fluoride-Free Toothpaste: I got this when I couldn't find the above version. Works almost as well.

 

Get It Under Wraps!

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Wish Formula Bat Eye Mask: Loved this one. The mask material is very soft and it's not over saturated with serum. It's also fun to have a bat sit on your face. Wait...

Bonvivant Collagen & Olive Face Mask: Very nice mask. The material was soft, had a decent fit around my eyes and mouth, smelled fantastic. The serum was more of a milky essence, read: not drippy. 

Choonee's Goat's Milk Face Mask: OMG I loved this mask. I started a new monthly subscription for just face masks and this was included in my first or second month. My skin LOVED the ingredients in this. It does come directly from Korea so unless you sign up for a service that will deliver it (like FACESTORY), you'll need to order directly from Korea.

Tarte Undereye Patches: These came in a sample set or travel set or something. Couldn't get on their own. Don't feel like they did much. Most of these kinds of eye patches don't, at least for me.

23.5N Rice Gel Mask: This stuff was pretty cool. And my skin felt nice and soft after using it. It's like aloe gel but a bit firmer, easier to spread across the face. No strong smell and it didn't burn. 

(DISCLAIMER: A lot of Korean skin care is hard to pin down on the cruelty free front. Within Korea, they are cracking down on animal testing and a lot of companies don't do it anymore. By 2018 they want to phase it out completely. Yay! But many companies do still sell to China and, again, it's difficult to find comprehensive info on company policies regarding being or going cruelty free.)

Ipsy June 2017 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10, you will received 4-5 sample (sometimes full sized) makeup, hair, and skin care products along with a reusable makeup bag. Check them out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

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This month's theme is whatever-who-fucking-cares month. The bag is really cute, though. Canvas on the outside with a nylon lining. I dig it. Let's get into the products, shall we?

Delectable Coconut and Cream Triple Moisture Body Lotion: (by Cake Beauty) I liked the lemon hand cream I got before much better than this. This is very lightweight and absorbs quickly, which is nice. But when I got my Ipsy bag, the second I opened the bubble pack I was smacked in the face with a coconut scent. The tube was still capped and sealed, nothing was broken or torn. But the scent just permeated EVERYTHING. Not very happy about that. I like coconut but dayum. Full size is 8 ounces so this 2 ounce size is valued around $3.50. (CF and Vegan)

Doucce Maxlash Volumizer Mascara (black): I can't report on this yet because I have about 5 open mascaras already. Didn't want to open this just yet. But I love trying new mascaras! Full size goes for $22 (can't seem to find the amount and a lot of mascaras hold between 7mls and 11 mls). So let's say this one is about 8mls so this travel size of 6 mls costs about $16.50 (CF)

Vasanti Cosmetics Power Oils Lip Gloss in Super Mom: Love love love this lip gloss. I'm actually a bit tired of matte lipstick (not that I will stop wearing it, of course) but with summer in full swing, it's nice to switch things up. Super pigmented, not sticky at all, long lasting, this color is gorgeous and will probably look good on almost everyone. Full sized, this gloss goes for $22 - though it's on sale right now for $19. (CF)

TheBalm Cosmetics Balm Springs Blush: I do like getting products from TheBalm. I've really enjoyed a lot of their makeup. This blush is a gorgeous neutral rosy shade. Look very natural, at least on my pasty ass skin. My only issue is the samples they use are so small they're hard to work with. Very difficult to get an even brush full of powder. Still nice though! Full size (5.5g) is $21 so this 1g sample is probably around $4. (CF)

Beauty for Real I-LINE 27-7 Eyeliner in Chocolate Fix: While I admit this color is really nice (sometimes it's hard to find a brown that's neutral or cool toned) the lasting power is for shit. Tightlined with it and within 5 minutes it was gone. It lasted a tad longer on the actual eye lids. Fucking weak. I doubt I'll be reaching for this very often. This is full sized and goes for $14. (I assume CF because the founder works with the SPCA - that'd be MAJOR hypocritical if the brands wasn't CF, yes?).

Wow, the value of this bag is around $57 (give or take a few bucks due to my mathematical prowess). That's not too shabby!

3B March 2016 Beauty Box

Okay, yes. I had the wrong month on the last review. For some reason I thought I missed one but apparently, I didn't. So last month was February and THIS month is March.

Glad we cleared that up.

3B is a monthly beauty subscription box. For $12 a month you get 4-5 samples/full sized Asian beauty, hair, skin products. Click on the link to get one for yourself!

Dermal Dream Sea Cucumber mask: You know I love face masks. I'm very excited to try this out. Apparently this brand, and this particular mask, are INFAMOUS in Korea. La dee dah! (sorry can't find a link for it)

Skinfood My Shortcake mascara: I also love trying different mascaras. This one is supposed to thicken, lengthen (soooo dirty...), and darken my lashes. It also dries quickly and is smudgeproof. My oily eyelids accept that challenge! Full size and it goes for about $7 on Amazon.

Secret Key Witch Hazel toner: I've used straight up witch hazel as a toner before so this is cool. But I think there's added fragrance in here because it doesn't smell as...earthy as regular witch hazel. This is full size and runs around $29!

CosRx Blackhead Silk Finger Balls: My word there's a lot of dirty innuendo in this post. These are little hard (hooo boy) cotton pods that go on your fingers. You soak them in hot water for a couple of minutes then "massage the desired area (wow) with the softened pod". And as I post the picture below, I can't help but notice a slight pornographic nature in it. You can get 2-3 uses from each one. A set of 12 (which is what I believe I got) costs around $5.

I can't even...

Just those three products I could find on-line are valued at about $41. Nice! You guys should get this service, too. Then we can all be dirty together.