The Monkey Is In.

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I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: Look At Me

MORGUE DRAWER December 2020

Reviewing garbage is just so appropriate right now. Used to feel kinda weird, but now that 2020 is coming to a close, it’s more fitting than ever.

Let’s take a look at all the stuff I used up over the past few months!

BEAT THAT MUG

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Notoriously Morbid Slumber Salve: I can’t remember the flavor/scent on this one but this stuff is awesome. It actually stays on overnight and my lips feel so soft in the morning. I really need to get more…

Essence Lash Princess Volume Mascara: I don’t enjoy the other formulas in this line, just the OG Volume. Really great at volumizing and separating my lashes. I love the bristle brush, too. I think this particular tube was a little clumpy, though.

Dionis Goat Milk Lip Balm: Pretty good balm. I think I have one more, in a different flavor, to try, so we’ll see if they’re consistent quality (looks like they may have changed the scent formula - Peppermint Twist is the name now).

Crazy Rumors Lip Balm: This one ended up being terrible. It dried out my lips the more I used it.

Medusa’s Makup Rage Against the Bean Lip Balm: Very good lip balm, wonderful vanilla scent. Would definitely buy again. This looks like it might be an old formula (there are new balms with new packaging on the site) so this is on mega sale right now.

Tarte Sex Kitten Eye Liner: This is a great eyeliner. Very black, and doesn’t smudge or move all day. It’s probably one of the few liners that actually stays on my waterline, too.

Milani Highly Rated Mascara: It’s…okay. It works better as a layering mascara, not so great on its own.

LIKE BUTTAH

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Carol’s Daughter Almond Cookie Frappe Body Lotion: HOLY AMAZEBALLS. This stuff is a great moisturizer AND the scent is straight up almond cookie. It’s aweoms.

Nature’s Truth Sweet Almond Oil: I get this stuff at Meijers. Great base oil to mix with essential oils or scent oils to make you own…whatever!

Theme Creme Screaming Lambs: I can’t remember if the name of the shope is Theme Creme, or that’s the line. But I met the owner at a local horror con a few years ago and bought 3 jars. This one has ingredients that help with sore muscles and bruising (a strong clove scent). And it was really great, as are the other 2. The only problem is that when this gets warm, the beeswax beads resolidify so there are a bunch of little wax beads in the lotion that take a while to remelt against the skin. Otherwise, I loved this stuff, but I don’t know where to buy it.

MY SKIN WOULD MAKE A GREAT LAMP SHADE

Formula 10.0.6 Picture Perfect Day Cream with SPF 15: Staple moisturizer. Will continue to repurchase (though with the winter months upon us, I’ve been adding in a facial oil with it).

ELF Happy Hydration Cream: Nice, and I liked that it had no scent.

The SAEM Baobab Collagen Cream: I really liked this but the company is not cruelty free so will not repurchase. I can only find this on Amazon and Ebay (as opposed to Asian beauty websites) so not sure if they still make it or it’s being phased out.

Fourth Ray Beauty BFD Cleansing Oil: Since cleansing balms now bother my eyes, I’ve turned to oils. This is a really nice one.

The SAEM Green Tea Cleansing Water: It was okay. Not great, but not the worst.

Mad Hippie Cream Cleanser: This is a new brand to me, and this cleanser is fantastic. Already repurchased.

Mario Badescu Rose Facial Spray: Staple face mist. Will continue to repurchase.

TN Dickinson’s Witch Hazel: This was fine but the scent was a little off-putting (the natural scent of witch hazel is very earthy). I got a different brand now and it does NOT have a scent like this one at all.

Formula 10.0.6 Berry Fresh Balancing Mud Mask: Good, but I didn’t use it up fast enough. Had to pitch it. Also it doesn’t look like they make this one anymore.

Look At Me Sweet Honey Sheet Mask: This was awesome. Good scent, good serum, and my skin felt great the next day. I got mine in my Facetory subsription but you can get this at YesStyle.

The Ordinary Niacinamide Serum: My skin loves this serum so I will keep buying it. Eventually, my skin acclimates and rebels, but if I just switch it out for the Fourth Ray version (and go back and forth between those two brands), it’s fine.

Fourth Ray Beauty Reveal AHA Serum: Really enjoyed this and it smells great.

Fourth Ray Beauty Papaya Face Milk: My skin loves this particular face milk (I’ve tried other and my face ain’t having it). Smells like papaya candy and my skin actually gets a nice glow from it (hubby even commented one day about it).

Good Molecules Niacinamide Serum: This is okay. My skin doesn’t like it as much as the Ordinary or Fourth Ray Beauty. You’d think they’d all mostly be the same but nope.

GEE, YOUR HAIR SMELLS TERRIFIC

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Hask Coconut Dry Shampoo: Works pretty well, and the coconut scent isn’t TOO overpowering.

Hask Unwined Dry Shampoo: This also works pretty well, but the scent is very very strong. Won’t be getting this one again. Can’t find this particular dry shampoo anymore (they have regular shampoo in this line, though).

DEBRIS

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Tippy Toes Baby Wipes: I use these to wipe off swatches or my hands. I will use wipes to clean up fall out under my eyes, but always have to apply a face oil afterwards. No matter how gentle the brand says it is, it’s always a bit drying on the face. The scent on these is awful, though. Maybe their unscented ones are better…?

Apagard Nano-Hydroxyapetite Toothpaste: I wanted to see if this stuff actually works. NAHA is an ingredient, created by NASA and sold to Japan, that helps build enamel in your teeth from the inside out (as opposed to fluoride which helps on the outer layer of the teeth). You can look up scientific papers on-line about it and why NASA created it, but Japan has been using it in their dental care since 1970 (I believe). And I’ll be damned if this stuff doesn’t work. My teeth are sensitive and if I don’t use sensitive toothpaste, they hurt like hell. NAHA helps with sensitivity by repairing micro-scratches or breeches in your enamel so now I don’t need sensitive specific toothpaste. How fucking cool is that?

Tom’s of Main Sensitive Toothpaste: This is what I used before I found that Apagard stuff (I’m also trying the Boka brand with the NAHA since I won’t want to have to wait to get the paste from Japan). It’s great stuff.

Native Natural Deodorants: Natural deodorants don’t work on me - and these are no exception. They actually make me sweat more. But I wanted to try this brand because so many people were singing its praises (and I got a coupon). So…yeah. Total bust. But it’s fine if I’m staying at home and not overexerting myself with anything. They smell really nice, too.


All righty. That wraps up my trash for 2020. Fingers crossed that 2021 will only have me talking about literal garbage instead of metaphorical.

fingers crossed dr horrible.gif


Morgue Drawer April 2020

Who wants to trash talk? And by that I mean talk about my garbage, not bad mouth and gossip about bullshit and politics.

For the newbs, this is the post where I talk about all the products I’ve used up over the past few months. AKA empties. Let’s take a look!

BEAT THAT MUG

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Colourpop Super Shock Shadow in Puppy Love: This was a limited edition shade for a fundraiser CP had. It supported dog rescue efforts so OF COURSE I had to buy it. It was a lovely, soft peach shade. Great for a simple, one-color-all-over look. I had it for years but it’s finally dried out. *WAAAAAH*

NYX Pore Filler Face Primer: This is one of those cream colored primers that blur the appearance of pores. This does work pretty well, but it can look a little dry. I probably won’t get it again.

Catrice Multi-Talent Fixing Spray: I love this stuff. It works great at sealing in my makeup, and it gives my skin a gorgeous glow (think shiny but not greasy or metallic). They have a Dewy and Glow version but I don’t think that one gives any better effect than this one. Personal choice, I guess!

So many mascaras…

Covergirl Clump Crusher: I used to love this before I went cruelty free a few years ago. But now that CG is cruelty free (HOORAY!), I bought this again. Unfortunately, it’s not as good as I remember. Doesn’t give much length or volume. It does separate the lashes nicely, but it works better if you layer it with something else.

The Balm Mad Lash: Love love love this mascara! Great at lengthening and adding volume. I usually don’t buy it because it’s $18. But as of my typing this, there’s a flash sale of 50% at the site. WHOOP! I hope that doesn’t mean they’re discontinuing it and are getting rid of stock…

Buxom Volumizing Mascara: I think this is the volumizing one. There’s no indication on the sample tube but it looks like the one on the Buxom website. It was…okay. Better as a layering mascara.

Medusa’s Makeup Witch Lash: This is great stuff. Not for volume; okay for lengthening. But if you combine it with a mascara that transfers or smudges, the Witch Lash will stop it from doing that. I don’t know how - this is not the waterproof version. It’s MAGIC. (the link goes to the Twilight Blue color because I can’t find the black one - they may not make it anymore. SON OF A BI-)

Tarte Lights Camera Lashes: One of my favorite mascaras of all time. But I only buy it on sale because $23 for a tube of mascara is fucking nuts. But Ulta has it on sale a few times a year; sometimes Tarte will run a promotion.

MY SKIN WOULD MAKE A GREAT LAMPSHADE

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Mario Badescu Rose Facial Spray: Been using this for years. Still love it.

The Ordinary Niacinamide Zinc Serum: Niacinamide is the one ingredient that’s made a visible difference in my skin care routine. It’s supposed to minimize the appearance of pores and gods damn, it really does. I’ve used this one and the Fourth Ray Beauty one (Colourpop’s skin care line). Both are equally effective. I’ve heard some YouTubers say the 10% concentration is too low for more mature skin, but I call bullshit. I only started using this last year, when I was 49 (or maybe even after I turned 50) and it worked great for me. I switch between brands because my skin does acclimate after a while, but I’ve had no issues with either CP or The Ordinary.

The Ordinary HA Moisturizer: This was just an ordinary (no pun intended) moisturizer. Didn’t do anything special. Since there’s no SPF in, I used it at night. But either way, it wasn’t all that. I’ve learned that hyaluronic acid doesn’t really do anything for my skin.

Context Vitamin C Eye Cream: I think I got this in an Ipsy bag about 100 years ago. It’s a thin, gel-like cream. It’s fine but doesn’t really DO anything. Plus it’s old so it’s gotta go.

Formula 10.0.6 Day Cream: Been using this for years. Still love it.

ELF Gentle Peeling Gel: I technically haven’t used this up but the pump broke, so I just put the product in a squeeze tube. I love peeling gels. I don’t know why, but they are really nice gentle exfoliators. This one is nice.

Pacifica Cherry Lava Purify Mask: This was a decent mask. Smelled like cherries, so it was right up my alley. But it’s gotten old and the last time I used it, it broke me out. Oh well. (Pacifica no longer makes it so I can’t, in good conscience, link you to an Amazon store that sells it for almost $30, when Pacifica sold it for around $12-15).

Formula 10.0.6 Deep Down Detox Mud Mask: I adore this mask. Clay/mud mask products work very well on my skin. If I’ve got some stubborn breakouts, I use this and almost overnight, they’re gone or on their way out. Love the smell (orange), too. But it’s gotten old, just like the Pacifica one, and broke me out last time I used it. For some reason it’s labeled as PREORDER of the Formula 10.0.6 website so…not sure what that’s about.

Look At Me Watermelon Face Mask: It’s been a while since I used this but if I remember correctly, I loved this. It smells fantastic, and my skin felt great the next day. And no breakouts! (I got this and the charcoal one through MyFaceTory subscription and they now have a store front!)

Naisture Charcoal Face Mask: I loved the feel of the cotton mask itself - very soft. I don’t think the smell was anything to write home about but my skin loved it.

SQUEAKY CLEAN

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Babyganic Baby Wipes: I used to get these at my grocery store. But they don’t carry them anymore. You can find these at a bunch of other places, though, like CVS, Meijer, Target, Kroger, Walmart. They’re ERRWHERE.

The Potion Cabinet Shower Gel in Flesh Squeezed Virgin Blood (aka Black Cherry): I love the shower gels from this Etsy store. And this smelled like tart cherry candy, actually. But the scent doesn’t linger on the skin to compete with any other scented products you might use. The gel itself is great and makes my skin feel really soft. Highly recommend any scent of theirs (right now looks like this scent is out of stock).

Beauty of Joseon Cleansing Balm: I got this is my Daebak box and though it’s a sample, I got two uses out of it. The first time was great but the second, when I really worked it on my eye makeup, I woke up the next day with crusty itchy eyes. This is the 3rd or 4th balm that’s done that so I’m officially never using cleansing balms again. It does work at taking off makeup, though, so if you enjoy these kinds of products, I would recommend it!

The Body Shop Tea Tree Facial Wash: I love to use this as my cleanser at night. I enjoy the scent of tea tree oil, and it is rather strong in this product, so keep that in mind if you want to try it. It works great with my skin.

The Body Shop Aloe Calming Cream Cleanser: I use this in the morning. It’s a very gentle cream cleanser. It’s nothing too extraordinary but it gets the job done.

GEE, YOUR HAIR SMELLS TERRIFIC

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Hask Argan Oil Dry Shampoo: I’ve tried almost all of the Hask dry shampoos and I think this one is my favorite. Smells great, doesn’t create too much white cast in the hair (unless you go balls to the wall spraying it), good job at decreasing the look of oil in your hair. And OF COURSE it’s no longer sold at Hask or other retails. MOTHER FUC-

Raw Sugar Texture Dry Shampoo in Coconut and Maqui Berry scent: I have the Raw Boost cream that works wonders on my hair, keeping it smooth. So I wanted to try something else. This dry shampoo….doesn’t really do anything. Doesn’t really add that much texture, either. But it smells fantastic!

Giovanni 2Chic Blackberry and Coconut Oil Hair Oil Serum: I love this stuff. It’s a little harder to find in stores now, but you can still get it at the Giovanni website. This is like a cross between a gel and an oil, not too thin, not too thick. Great at controlling frizz, and smoothing out waves or curls. Smells amazeballs, too!

EvolvH Smart Volume Leave In Conditioner: I got this YEARS ago, maybe in a Petite Vour bag? Not sure, but I was nervous to use it because this kind of thing usually leaves my hair weighed down and looking greasy. In fact, I said that in the initial unboxing and the company actually replied on my post, guaranteeing the product wouldn’t do that. And I’ll be damned if they weren’t right. This was really nice for my hair. And now that I’ve been bleaching my hair for a while, I might look into purchasing a full bottle.

Raw Sugar Boost (not pictured): I grabbed a bottle of this at Meijer on a whim. This stuff is awesome! It keeps my hair frizz to a minimum; helps the waves/curls keep their shape as my hair dries, too. It’s so nice. Looks like it only comes in the small size, which is fine because mine lasted for months (to be fair - I only wash my hair 1-2x a week and only use this when my hair is still wet).

DEBRIS

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Tom’s of Main Rapid Relief Sensitive Toothpaste: My go to for toothpaste. I did actually go a week or two without using it, just to make sure it was actually working. Holy shit, my teeth hurt so much before I went back. GAH. Will continue to purchase and use this product.

Mitchum Women Stick Deoderant: Love this stuff. Works great. Smells great. Is great. This was the gel form, but I prefer the solid stick. Both work well, but the gel takes a while to dry down and it still leaves white marks on your clothes if you’re not careful.

Cake Beauty Ultra-Nourishing Hand Cream: Again, not available from Cake Beauty anymore, so I just linked to their general hand cream page. This stuff was awesome. Absorbed fast, made my skin feel great, and smelled like lemon cake. Aaahhh….But this stuff is really old and started to smell kinda funky.

All righty. We’ve reached the bottom of the bin. Hope some of this was helpful, if you’re looking for recommendations. Until next time!