The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: Covergirl

Morgue Drawer April 2020

Who wants to trash talk? And by that I mean talk about my garbage, not bad mouth and gossip about bullshit and politics.

For the newbs, this is the post where I talk about all the products I’ve used up over the past few months. AKA empties. Let’s take a look!

BEAT THAT MUG

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Colourpop Super Shock Shadow in Puppy Love: This was a limited edition shade for a fundraiser CP had. It supported dog rescue efforts so OF COURSE I had to buy it. It was a lovely, soft peach shade. Great for a simple, one-color-all-over look. I had it for years but it’s finally dried out. *WAAAAAH*

NYX Pore Filler Face Primer: This is one of those cream colored primers that blur the appearance of pores. This does work pretty well, but it can look a little dry. I probably won’t get it again.

Catrice Multi-Talent Fixing Spray: I love this stuff. It works great at sealing in my makeup, and it gives my skin a gorgeous glow (think shiny but not greasy or metallic). They have a Dewy and Glow version but I don’t think that one gives any better effect than this one. Personal choice, I guess!

So many mascaras…

Covergirl Clump Crusher: I used to love this before I went cruelty free a few years ago. But now that CG is cruelty free (HOORAY!), I bought this again. Unfortunately, it’s not as good as I remember. Doesn’t give much length or volume. It does separate the lashes nicely, but it works better if you layer it with something else.

The Balm Mad Lash: Love love love this mascara! Great at lengthening and adding volume. I usually don’t buy it because it’s $18. But as of my typing this, there’s a flash sale of 50% at the site. WHOOP! I hope that doesn’t mean they’re discontinuing it and are getting rid of stock…

Buxom Volumizing Mascara: I think this is the volumizing one. There’s no indication on the sample tube but it looks like the one on the Buxom website. It was…okay. Better as a layering mascara.

Medusa’s Makeup Witch Lash: This is great stuff. Not for volume; okay for lengthening. But if you combine it with a mascara that transfers or smudges, the Witch Lash will stop it from doing that. I don’t know how - this is not the waterproof version. It’s MAGIC. (the link goes to the Twilight Blue color because I can’t find the black one - they may not make it anymore. SON OF A BI-)

Tarte Lights Camera Lashes: One of my favorite mascaras of all time. But I only buy it on sale because $23 for a tube of mascara is fucking nuts. But Ulta has it on sale a few times a year; sometimes Tarte will run a promotion.

MY SKIN WOULD MAKE A GREAT LAMPSHADE

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Mario Badescu Rose Facial Spray: Been using this for years. Still love it.

The Ordinary Niacinamide Zinc Serum: Niacinamide is the one ingredient that’s made a visible difference in my skin care routine. It’s supposed to minimize the appearance of pores and gods damn, it really does. I’ve used this one and the Fourth Ray Beauty one (Colourpop’s skin care line). Both are equally effective. I’ve heard some YouTubers say the 10% concentration is too low for more mature skin, but I call bullshit. I only started using this last year, when I was 49 (or maybe even after I turned 50) and it worked great for me. I switch between brands because my skin does acclimate after a while, but I’ve had no issues with either CP or The Ordinary.

The Ordinary HA Moisturizer: This was just an ordinary (no pun intended) moisturizer. Didn’t do anything special. Since there’s no SPF in, I used it at night. But either way, it wasn’t all that. I’ve learned that hyaluronic acid doesn’t really do anything for my skin.

Context Vitamin C Eye Cream: I think I got this in an Ipsy bag about 100 years ago. It’s a thin, gel-like cream. It’s fine but doesn’t really DO anything. Plus it’s old so it’s gotta go.

Formula 10.0.6 Day Cream: Been using this for years. Still love it.

ELF Gentle Peeling Gel: I technically haven’t used this up but the pump broke, so I just put the product in a squeeze tube. I love peeling gels. I don’t know why, but they are really nice gentle exfoliators. This one is nice.

Pacifica Cherry Lava Purify Mask: This was a decent mask. Smelled like cherries, so it was right up my alley. But it’s gotten old and the last time I used it, it broke me out. Oh well. (Pacifica no longer makes it so I can’t, in good conscience, link you to an Amazon store that sells it for almost $30, when Pacifica sold it for around $12-15).

Formula 10.0.6 Deep Down Detox Mud Mask: I adore this mask. Clay/mud mask products work very well on my skin. If I’ve got some stubborn breakouts, I use this and almost overnight, they’re gone or on their way out. Love the smell (orange), too. But it’s gotten old, just like the Pacifica one, and broke me out last time I used it. For some reason it’s labeled as PREORDER of the Formula 10.0.6 website so…not sure what that’s about.

Look At Me Watermelon Face Mask: It’s been a while since I used this but if I remember correctly, I loved this. It smells fantastic, and my skin felt great the next day. And no breakouts! (I got this and the charcoal one through MyFaceTory subscription and they now have a store front!)

Naisture Charcoal Face Mask: I loved the feel of the cotton mask itself - very soft. I don’t think the smell was anything to write home about but my skin loved it.

SQUEAKY CLEAN

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Babyganic Baby Wipes: I used to get these at my grocery store. But they don’t carry them anymore. You can find these at a bunch of other places, though, like CVS, Meijer, Target, Kroger, Walmart. They’re ERRWHERE.

The Potion Cabinet Shower Gel in Flesh Squeezed Virgin Blood (aka Black Cherry): I love the shower gels from this Etsy store. And this smelled like tart cherry candy, actually. But the scent doesn’t linger on the skin to compete with any other scented products you might use. The gel itself is great and makes my skin feel really soft. Highly recommend any scent of theirs (right now looks like this scent is out of stock).

Beauty of Joseon Cleansing Balm: I got this is my Daebak box and though it’s a sample, I got two uses out of it. The first time was great but the second, when I really worked it on my eye makeup, I woke up the next day with crusty itchy eyes. This is the 3rd or 4th balm that’s done that so I’m officially never using cleansing balms again. It does work at taking off makeup, though, so if you enjoy these kinds of products, I would recommend it!

The Body Shop Tea Tree Facial Wash: I love to use this as my cleanser at night. I enjoy the scent of tea tree oil, and it is rather strong in this product, so keep that in mind if you want to try it. It works great with my skin.

The Body Shop Aloe Calming Cream Cleanser: I use this in the morning. It’s a very gentle cream cleanser. It’s nothing too extraordinary but it gets the job done.

GEE, YOUR HAIR SMELLS TERRIFIC

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Hask Argan Oil Dry Shampoo: I’ve tried almost all of the Hask dry shampoos and I think this one is my favorite. Smells great, doesn’t create too much white cast in the hair (unless you go balls to the wall spraying it), good job at decreasing the look of oil in your hair. And OF COURSE it’s no longer sold at Hask or other retails. MOTHER FUC-

Raw Sugar Texture Dry Shampoo in Coconut and Maqui Berry scent: I have the Raw Boost cream that works wonders on my hair, keeping it smooth. So I wanted to try something else. This dry shampoo….doesn’t really do anything. Doesn’t really add that much texture, either. But it smells fantastic!

Giovanni 2Chic Blackberry and Coconut Oil Hair Oil Serum: I love this stuff. It’s a little harder to find in stores now, but you can still get it at the Giovanni website. This is like a cross between a gel and an oil, not too thin, not too thick. Great at controlling frizz, and smoothing out waves or curls. Smells amazeballs, too!

EvolvH Smart Volume Leave In Conditioner: I got this YEARS ago, maybe in a Petite Vour bag? Not sure, but I was nervous to use it because this kind of thing usually leaves my hair weighed down and looking greasy. In fact, I said that in the initial unboxing and the company actually replied on my post, guaranteeing the product wouldn’t do that. And I’ll be damned if they weren’t right. This was really nice for my hair. And now that I’ve been bleaching my hair for a while, I might look into purchasing a full bottle.

Raw Sugar Boost (not pictured): I grabbed a bottle of this at Meijer on a whim. This stuff is awesome! It keeps my hair frizz to a minimum; helps the waves/curls keep their shape as my hair dries, too. It’s so nice. Looks like it only comes in the small size, which is fine because mine lasted for months (to be fair - I only wash my hair 1-2x a week and only use this when my hair is still wet).

DEBRIS

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Tom’s of Main Rapid Relief Sensitive Toothpaste: My go to for toothpaste. I did actually go a week or two without using it, just to make sure it was actually working. Holy shit, my teeth hurt so much before I went back. GAH. Will continue to purchase and use this product.

Mitchum Women Stick Deoderant: Love this stuff. Works great. Smells great. Is great. This was the gel form, but I prefer the solid stick. Both work well, but the gel takes a while to dry down and it still leaves white marks on your clothes if you’re not careful.

Cake Beauty Ultra-Nourishing Hand Cream: Again, not available from Cake Beauty anymore, so I just linked to their general hand cream page. This stuff was awesome. Absorbed fast, made my skin feel great, and smelled like lemon cake. Aaahhh….But this stuff is really old and started to smell kinda funky.

All righty. We’ve reached the bottom of the bin. Hope some of this was helpful, if you’re looking for recommendations. Until next time!

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs 2019 Year End

I’ve had my empties and other products sitting in my office, waiting on me to get my shit together and start reviewing, for over a week! Gah, I hate year end madness and my general laziness…

Anyway, let’s get into the final PDs, MEHs, and GFYs for the year 2019.

PDs (Panty Droppers)

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Colourpop Super Shock Cheek in Rain: This lasted FOREVER - I tried to pan it, but just couldn’t get there. It did finally start to dry out, so I have to get rid of it. But the color is soft and gorgeous, and it doesn’t look like my John was keeping his pimp hand strong when I get out of line. They don’t have the purple color anymore (cries softly) but they have a lot of gorgeous shades.

Milani Eye Shadow Primer: This is the best shadow primer for me. I’ve tried a bunch of others, but nothing compares to this (cue Sinead O’Connor). I didn’t quite finish it up because it takes such a small amount to work, but it was getting dry and not working as well. I have since repurchased.

Merchant of Galifry Lip Balm in Cassian scent: Got this from Etsy and it was a great lip balm. Again, I didn’t finish it up in time before the texture started to change and the smell went a little off. The store doesn’t make lip balms anymore, unfortunately.

Joah Truly Yours Liquid Foundation in Ivory: This is a BEAUTIFUL foundation. Light to medium coverage, looks so nice on the skin. Doesn’t look like a mask, very natural, even gives a bit of a glow/dewy look. But the color changed - it’s way too dark now - even though I haven’t even had it a year. So if you get this, be sure to use it up quickly. They did come out with a couple lighter colors, so now I have Porcelain. Fingers crossed it doesn’t darken!

Lunatick Cosmetic Labs Supernatural Eye Shadow Palette: I found this at a horror convention back in 2016, I think. I’ve already posted about their lipstick in Lacrimosa that was one of my favorites. This is a gorgeous palette, colors are pigmented, and perform well. But they are super soft and one broke on me - so don’t travel with them! But now that it’s been 3 years, the texture has changed a bit and they don’t perform well, which happens to us all when we get old, amirite?

MEHs (just what it says)

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Ulta Brow Tint in Medium: I used to love this brow gel, but I think they changed the formula or I got an off container. The gel is very gloppy and hard to work with. The color is awesome and the hold was great. I don’t have a lot of brow hairs, though what I’ve got appreciated this. But now I can’t seem to use it anymore. *le sigh*

Essence Make Me Brow in Browny Brow: See above. But it’s $3. If you have thicker brows than I do (which is EVERYONE), this could work just fine.

Covergirl Exhibitionist Mascara: Now that CG is cruelty free (HOORAY!) I thought I’d try this mascara that everyone and their Aunt Flo has their panties in a twist over. It’s…really nothing special. It gives a soft natural look, darkens the lashes nicely, and I love the brush. But do I need to shout from the mountaintops that it changed my life? Uh…no.

Colourpop Super Shock Shadow in Baby Talk: I got this thinking it was going to be a rich red color but it’s a pink/magenta. It’s gorgeous, but not what I expected (if I had read the color description, I wouldn’t have been surprised - DOH). Also, it’s already dried up, and I never even got to his pan on it. Gah.

Revolution (formerly Makeup Revolution) Fast Base Concealer in C4: It’s a decent concealer, helped a bit with the purple under my eyes, and I liked that it matched my skin tone perfectly. But it does end up looking a little dry after a while. I also think the color darkened a bit (like the Joah foundation did). Not terrible, but not my favorite.


GFYs (Go Fuck Yourselves)



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Essence Eyebrow Pen in Dark Brown: THIS IS SOME SERIOUS BULLSHIT. This is one of those brow markers that has the jagged tip, to make drawing several hair shapes at once easier. And when I tried it on my right brow, it was brilliant! I couldn’t believe it! So I went to draw on the left eyebrow….and the pen was dried out. NOT FUCKING KIDDING. I practically had to scratch my skin off to get any color out of it after using it ONE FUCKING TIME. It could be that I got a dud so I did purchase another, but I’m terrified to try it because I’ll only get one use! This is too fucking stressful, Essence. Get your shit together. Just because you’re inexpensive, shouldn’t mean your products end up in the shit pile.

Joah Wand Me Up Concealer in Fair: Completely useless. I’d dab product under my eye, blend it out, and it disappeared. I tried to build it up. Nothing. I don’t get it. Is there invisible ink in it or something? Total waste of money.

ELF Jelly Pop Flush Blush in Berry Pop: At first, I had this under the MEHs, but the more I thought about it, and retested it, this product is terrible. It’s hard to blend, and looks so patchy on the skin. When you slather it on the back of your hand for a swatch, the color is super pretty. But it’s just way too difficult to work with on the face and seriously, there are so many other cream or liquid blushes out there that work so much better. Fuck this noise.

So that wraps it up for this year. I look forward to 2020 and all the goodness, fun, and fiery rage new products will be offering. Hope you all have a wonderful remaining 2019!



PDs, MEHs, and GFYs June 2019

Surprisingly this month, I have fewer duds than goodies. Huh. Not sure I like this turn of events…Anyway, here are some products I’ve really enjoyed, felt indifferent toward, or just plain hated. Hope you like it!

(For those of you who are new here, PD - Panty Droppers; MEH - meh; GFY - Go Fuck Yourself)


PDs

Makeup Geek Gel Liner in Poison: This was the first red gel eyeliner I ever used. I had this thing for YEARS and it wouldn’t dry out! Great color, did not budge, didn’t make my eyes look like I was sick, either. Red and pinks can do that… It did finally dry up, though, so it was too difficult to use. Highly recommend this product! But…it looks like MG doesn’t make gel liners anymore. GAH!

Catrice Prime and Fine Smoothing Primer: I loved this primer. It really smooths out the appearance of my Nebraska-sized pores, and the texture is almost like a mousse. Feels great on the skin, more like a moisturizer.

Colourpop Lip Gloss in Fairy Floss: My absolute favorite nude gloss ever. Unfortunately, after years of faithful service, it now tingles when I put it on. That’s less than optimal, so I gotta toss it. I’ve already ordered a replacement.

MEH

NYX Worth the Hype Mascara: It’s not. It does make the lashes look darker, but more natural and not a lot of volume. I don’t mind that, but this doesn’t do what it says.

Colourpop Brow Boss Gel: I don’t really get this product. It’s white and feels like lotion, which doesn’t really do much for keeping rogue brow hairs in place. But because it’s not tinted, it’s less messy to work with, which is nice.

Bobbi Brown Illuminating Moisture Balm: I love the glow this stuff gives - so pretty. But the smell is horrendous! Very much like chemicals and plastic. UGH.

Katy Perry x Covergirl Katy Kat Lip Gloss in Cobalt Kitty: I originally posted about this a while ago because I thought it was such a fun color. And it is! But it’s streaky and difficult to work with. Very patchy, low pigment, and wearing it over a lip liner or another lip product doesn’t help.


GFY

ELF Velvet Touch Eye Shadow in Island Breeze: I got this little palette free with an order from ELF. And now I know why. They probably can’t get rid of these fast enough. The colors look pretty but they pigment is just not there. You can’t build them up and what goes on the lids does NOT last. The high moisture content is disgusting. The plastic package had smears of something wet on it - I’m hoping just the water or oils from the shadows themselves. They feel mushy and the peach shade was very wet. Blech.

Colourpop Jelly Much Shadow in Hallucinogenius: I really liked this stuff at first. It was squishy, like a jelly, but the color and sparkle were so pretty. But I only used this stuff two or three times, and I made sure the little pot was closed tightly after every use. But this stuff is dry and hard now, and all I get is a little sparkle on my finger. WHAT THE FUCK?



That’s it for this month. See you guys down the road!

Morgue Drawer November 2016

Yeah...so much for that every couple of months idea. I should have known better. I'll try harder for 2017. In the meantime, here is my final Morgue Drawer for 2016.

All products have been purchased with my own money (or came in a subscription service I purchase myself) so all opinions are my honest ones.

TELL ME I'M PRETTY

ELF Makeup Wipes: I like these to clean up any swatches I do for picture/testing purposes. They sting my face and eyes too much. At $3, I don't feel bad when they're gone. I will continue to repurchase. (CF)

ELF Makeup Setting Spray: I do like this for my skin. Not everyone agrees it does anything but it seems to work for me. The nozzle can get a little wonky so that pisses me off. I've since purchased a different brand so we'll see how that goes. (CF)

ELF Mineral Infused mascara: Decent product that gets good length (oh boy). You can get a very soft natural look with this. (CF) 

RiRe Mascara: You can get good length with this and so-so volume. The brush is very odd, though. Looks like a old-fashioned toilet brush. (?)

Covergirl Supersizer masacara (Star Wars edition): I got this right after I decided to go cruelty free. So fucking sue me, I was weak. It had Darth Vadar on it, okay? (SW no longer available so the link is to the regular packaging) Fantastic mascara. Great job at lengthening and separating lashes. (NCF)

L'Oreal Invisible Lift CC concealer: Very thin formula so it's not great with coverage. Very brightening though. (NCF)

ALL CLEAN AND SHIT

Bath & Body Works Jasmine Vanilla shower gel: Yes, I still buy this. I knew I would (and I've stated I probably would) because I've never smelled anything like it anywhere else. Hopefully BBW will get their shit together and stop selling to China someday (CF except for the China thing)

Tom's of Maine sensitive toothpaste: I love this stuff. It's the only sensitive toothpaste that does NOT cause the flesh of my cheeks to peel off like every other kind does. I know that's gross but that's what happens to me. (CF)

Method Foaming Soaps: I have discovered a replacement for the BBW foaming hand soaps. Though the lavender scent is waaaaay too strong and the Sea Minerals scent is meh, the Lemon Mint and Sweet Water are awesome. (CF)

Clear Scalp and Hair Therapy shampoo/conditioner: I got these in a Walmart or Target box a long time ago. They're okay. Smell nice. Good for traveling but can't say they did much else. (NCF)

 

I WANT TO CLEAN AND MOISTURIZE YOU ALL OVER

Soap and Glory Vitamin C face wash: My skin loved this face wash. My nose...not so much. The smell is very strong, like Ivory soap strong. It does have some scrubby beads in it but not really enough to do more than get caught in your mouth. Not sure I'll ever purchase again. (CF)

Soap and Glory Body Buttercream in Sugar Crush: The smell of this is amazing! I wish it had a stronger lime scent but it's still pretty fucking good. Also it moisturizes the skin so well that it'll stay soft and smooth until the next time you shower (sometimes I skip a day and my skin retains moisture the whole time). I highly recommend it. (CF)

Burt's Bees Sensitive face cleanser: I used this in the morning and  the S&G one at night. Loved this cream cleanser. Not drying at all. Did a great job. (CF)

CeraVe AM face moisturizer: This is formulated for dry skin. I don't normally have that problem but I did for a few months this year and I don't know why. I also wanted to try it because it's CF. This stuff was great. Didn't need to use a ton of it at one time, either, so this small bottle lasted a long time. Plus it's got SPF30. (CF)

Mario Badescu facial spray: I've been purchasing this for a while now. I will continue repurchasing. I like to use this right before my moisturizer. Lovely smell of roses but not too overpowering. (CF)

Mario Badescu eye creams: I got two samples with an Ulta order: Glycolic eye cream and Ceramide eye gel. Two different formulas but they both had the same results - they never fully absorbed into my skin so I don't feel they did jack shit. If you're super dry under your eyes, you might enjoy this. I am not so I'll stick to the regular hylauronic eye cream I use now. (CF)

UNT Aqua Nettoyant hydrating cleanser: This was great. Not drying, cleaned my skin well. Tastes terrible though (I know you're not supposed to eat it but I can't keep everything out of my mouth all of the...dammit) (owned by Acacia which is CF)

Botanic Farm Grain ferment cleansing sherbet: Very cool product. It has a thicker than Vaseline texture, not super greasy or oily, but great at removing all makeup. Then you wash with your regular cleanser aftereward. Loved this. Probably the best product I've tried at removing ALL makeup. (?)

Juice Beauty Green Apple Peel blemish clearing: This thin jelly-like product was very strange. Not sure if it cleaned my skin but the warm tingly sensation tells me it might have peeled a layer of dead cells off my face. My skin felt really nice after each use. (CF)

It's Skin face pack: This was a little thicker than the Juice Beauty product. Cool texture, made my skin feel nice. But I didn't get 2-3 uses out of it because, even though I taped it closed, it still dried up a bit and became gummy. I just got something similar in my latest 3B bag so maybe I'll get a better idea this time. (CF)

Etude House cleansing oil (not pictured here - it's in my PDMEHGFY post): I loved this stuff. Great at breaking down makeup and smelled great. Still need to use your regular face wash after but it was worth the extra step (just like the cleansing sherbet). (NCF)

TOO BAD HARVEY DENT DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT THESE

I'm Sorry For My Skin pore care and revitalizing sheet masks: These were cool. The essence on these masks is very jelly-like. The mask material is super soft and fit well. My skin felt great after each of these. (found 1 blog with CF claims)

Montagne Jeunesse black seaweed peel mask: I love this stuff. It's intimidating, I admit. And the smell can be off-putting. But I love this one more than most of the others I've tried of this brand. (CF)

Sally's Box Secret Garden ampoule masks: Loved these. You put the extra serum on first. Before it's fully absorbed, you put the serum saturated sheet mask on. Extremely moisturizing, soft cotton mask. My skin felt great after each of these. (?)

Wish Formula centella honey mask: Very soft and fit well. Extra saturated but my skin didn't feel moist when I took it off so I don't think it did much. (?)

Wish Formula Bat eye mask: Loved this. The cloth was soft and saturated and I felt like it moisturized under my eyes (unlike the previous mask). (?)

Tosowoong Sea Cucumber mask: The mask was soft and not overly saturated. Skin felt nice afterwards (NCF)

Bon Vivant masks, chamomile/greet tea and rose: These masks fit very well over my features. The chamomile and tea tree felt a little better than the rose. The rose stung a little but that was just the first one I used. The rose ones are also super fragile (that plastic mesh in the picture is what the mask was wrapped over but it didn't help a couple of them keep their shape - a few have fallen apart on me). (?)

Tony Moly lip patch: very amusing patch as it covered my whole chin! But it totally worked. My lips felt very soft, as did all the other skin this patch covered. (NCF)

Holy shit that's all. Hopefully I won't go 4 months next time!

Morgue Drawer May 2016

And again with keeping on time, though I guess technically I should have posted this a few days ago. But I was at Motor City Comic Con with my writing group so GET OFF MY BACK!

Anyway...let's get to it, shall we?

(Side note: I'm unsure about the cruelty free status of most of the Korean brands. If I know for sure, I'll mention it. Eventually I'll get to the point where I'll just mark CF or NCF but let's ease into that later.)

BECAUSE I'M ALL ABOUT THAT FACE, 'BOUT THAT FACE...

Neutrogena Oil-Free Moisture face lotion: I've used this stuff for years. Nice and lightweight, can put on two layers to get some extra moisturizing, and it's got SPF 15. Unfortunately, Neutrogena is NOT cruelty free so I've got to find an alternative.

Promise Organic Argan Creme face lotion: Speaking of alternatives, this would be a great one. Moisturizes very well without that greasy shiny look/feel that the Neutrogena one can give. And it smells like fresh oranges. This brand IS cruelty free but it doesn't have SPF. I like my face lotion to have sunscreen because I don't always wear makeup so I can't rely on that for sun protection.

Etude House Wonder Pore toner: Not sure this did anything. It didn't over dry my skin or make it break out but did it do anything else? *shrug*

Dr. Brandt PoreDermabrasion: Absolutely TERRIBLE stuff. The scrub was way too harsh and it actually caused two HUGE break outs on my chin. I'm also pretty sure this brand is NOT cruelty free so Dr. Brandt can just go fuck off.

Too Cool For School Egg Mellow Cream: I have a few more sample packs to use up so I'll get a better idea how this works. Initial trial worked well. Nice, thick cream that's very moisturizing. I'm excited to try the rest.

Sephora Lingzhi eye mask: Not really sure if this anti-aged or smoothed anything but my skin felt nice afterwards. Unfortunately, Sephora is not cruelty free so I won't be purchasing anything else from their line. (Note: when I went to find the link, this particular eye mask was no longer available - shocked, I tell you.)

3W Clinic Royal Jelly mask: Super saturated mask. My skin felt great after using it but the cut outs (for eyes, nose, etc.) do not fit my face well at all. It's kind of annoying. I don't want the essence...DEAR GODS IT'S ON MY EYEBALL!!

Botanic Farm Rice mask: This was an awesome cotton mask. Very saturated and the material was super soft. The cut outs fit so much better on my face than the 3W. Really enjoyed this one. (Note: as of the time I'm typing this, the only place I can find that sells this is Meme Box and they're currently sold out.)

 

GEE YOUR HAIR SMELLS LIKE YOU WERE BORN WITH IT

Hask Thickening Conditioner: Very nice. Smells softly of mint, not overpowering or sweet. Don't think it thickened my hair, though. Waiting to finish the shampoo and move on to another Hask product. This brand is cruelty free.

L'Oreal Total Repair 5 Conditioner: It's okay. I used it when I was coloring my hair and it was all frizzy and dry. Meh. L'Oreal is not cruelty free.

Batiste Dry Shampoo: The Fresh scent is better than the others I've tried but it can still be a little overpowering. There's a lot of mixed info out there about this brand, though their parent company tests on animals. As there are a ton of CF alternatives I haven't tried yet, I'll probably work through my current can and move on to something else afterwards.

Smashbox Full Exposure mascara: I really liked this mascara for volume. It was also really great to layer with other mascaras that didn't thicken lashes very well. Smashbox is not CF, though, so I'll never buy this brand (this was a sample I got in Ipsy, I think).

Maybelline Define-A-Lash mascara: Really great at separating lashes and defining them (go figure). But you could never build it up - it just got clumpy, even if layered with another mascara. Maybelline is not CF.

Covergirl Clump Crusher mascara: This was a fantastic mascara. Great at separating lashes and giving a bit of length and volume. Never clumped up even with multiple layers. Covergirl is not CF.

 

SMOOTH AS AN ANDROID'S BOTTOM

Nivea In-Shower lotion: Awesome, awesome stuff. Smells nice and the softness lasted on my skin all day. Unfortunately, Nivea is not CF.

Nivea Kiss of...lip balms: These have been some of my favorite balms. I didn't like the cherry or SPF one but these two are phenomenal. Makes me so sad that Nivea isn't CF. 

Marlowe body lotion: This is an okay moisturizer but the scent is heavy on the herbal side which I didn't care for. This brand is cruelty free, though!

Revo lip balm: It was all right. I've had a few others and this one probably had the best scent/flavor. But it's really waxy and doesn't last long on the lips. Because this is a Walgreens brand, it's not CF.

 

DIRTY AND HAIRY IS NO WAY TO GO THROUGH LIFE

Bath and Body Works foaming hand soap: Most of their scents are spot on for me. Rainkissed Leaves was clean and fresh, not too heavy; Coastal Water Lily was too strong (but lilies can be very heady); the Kitchen Lemon is the best. Unfortunately, BBW sells their products in China so even though they are CF here in the US, they are basically supporting animal testing elsewhere. Honestly, though, if I can't find another soap/candle/body wash brand that works for me, I will probably continue to purchase these few things from them.

Sally Hansen spray on hair remover: This stuff has an overpowering smell, as do most depilatories. But I like the convenience of a spray on. It works pretty well on thick coarse hair (read: bikini line) but I still need to use a wash cloth to help remove the foam/hair (even though you're supposed to be able to just rinse it off). Sally Hansen isn't cruelty free.

 

Okay. That covers the last couple of months. Tune in around mid-July for the next installment!