The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: witch hazel

MORGUE DRAWER December 2020

Reviewing garbage is just so appropriate right now. Used to feel kinda weird, but now that 2020 is coming to a close, it’s more fitting than ever.

Let’s take a look at all the stuff I used up over the past few months!

BEAT THAT MUG

20201203_133731.jpg

Notoriously Morbid Slumber Salve: I can’t remember the flavor/scent on this one but this stuff is awesome. It actually stays on overnight and my lips feel so soft in the morning. I really need to get more…

Essence Lash Princess Volume Mascara: I don’t enjoy the other formulas in this line, just the OG Volume. Really great at volumizing and separating my lashes. I love the bristle brush, too. I think this particular tube was a little clumpy, though.

Dionis Goat Milk Lip Balm: Pretty good balm. I think I have one more, in a different flavor, to try, so we’ll see if they’re consistent quality (looks like they may have changed the scent formula - Peppermint Twist is the name now).

Crazy Rumors Lip Balm: This one ended up being terrible. It dried out my lips the more I used it.

Medusa’s Makup Rage Against the Bean Lip Balm: Very good lip balm, wonderful vanilla scent. Would definitely buy again. This looks like it might be an old formula (there are new balms with new packaging on the site) so this is on mega sale right now.

Tarte Sex Kitten Eye Liner: This is a great eyeliner. Very black, and doesn’t smudge or move all day. It’s probably one of the few liners that actually stays on my waterline, too.

Milani Highly Rated Mascara: It’s…okay. It works better as a layering mascara, not so great on its own.

LIKE BUTTAH

20201203_133808.jpg

Carol’s Daughter Almond Cookie Frappe Body Lotion: HOLY AMAZEBALLS. This stuff is a great moisturizer AND the scent is straight up almond cookie. It’s aweoms.

Nature’s Truth Sweet Almond Oil: I get this stuff at Meijers. Great base oil to mix with essential oils or scent oils to make you own…whatever!

Theme Creme Screaming Lambs: I can’t remember if the name of the shope is Theme Creme, or that’s the line. But I met the owner at a local horror con a few years ago and bought 3 jars. This one has ingredients that help with sore muscles and bruising (a strong clove scent). And it was really great, as are the other 2. The only problem is that when this gets warm, the beeswax beads resolidify so there are a bunch of little wax beads in the lotion that take a while to remelt against the skin. Otherwise, I loved this stuff, but I don’t know where to buy it.

MY SKIN WOULD MAKE A GREAT LAMP SHADE

Formula 10.0.6 Picture Perfect Day Cream with SPF 15: Staple moisturizer. Will continue to repurchase (though with the winter months upon us, I’ve been adding in a facial oil with it).

ELF Happy Hydration Cream: Nice, and I liked that it had no scent.

The SAEM Baobab Collagen Cream: I really liked this but the company is not cruelty free so will not repurchase. I can only find this on Amazon and Ebay (as opposed to Asian beauty websites) so not sure if they still make it or it’s being phased out.

Fourth Ray Beauty BFD Cleansing Oil: Since cleansing balms now bother my eyes, I’ve turned to oils. This is a really nice one.

The SAEM Green Tea Cleansing Water: It was okay. Not great, but not the worst.

Mad Hippie Cream Cleanser: This is a new brand to me, and this cleanser is fantastic. Already repurchased.

Mario Badescu Rose Facial Spray: Staple face mist. Will continue to repurchase.

TN Dickinson’s Witch Hazel: This was fine but the scent was a little off-putting (the natural scent of witch hazel is very earthy). I got a different brand now and it does NOT have a scent like this one at all.

Formula 10.0.6 Berry Fresh Balancing Mud Mask: Good, but I didn’t use it up fast enough. Had to pitch it. Also it doesn’t look like they make this one anymore.

Look At Me Sweet Honey Sheet Mask: This was awesome. Good scent, good serum, and my skin felt great the next day. I got mine in my Facetory subsription but you can get this at YesStyle.

The Ordinary Niacinamide Serum: My skin loves this serum so I will keep buying it. Eventually, my skin acclimates and rebels, but if I just switch it out for the Fourth Ray version (and go back and forth between those two brands), it’s fine.

Fourth Ray Beauty Reveal AHA Serum: Really enjoyed this and it smells great.

Fourth Ray Beauty Papaya Face Milk: My skin loves this particular face milk (I’ve tried other and my face ain’t having it). Smells like papaya candy and my skin actually gets a nice glow from it (hubby even commented one day about it).

Good Molecules Niacinamide Serum: This is okay. My skin doesn’t like it as much as the Ordinary or Fourth Ray Beauty. You’d think they’d all mostly be the same but nope.

GEE, YOUR HAIR SMELLS TERRIFIC

20201203_133951.jpg

Hask Coconut Dry Shampoo: Works pretty well, and the coconut scent isn’t TOO overpowering.

Hask Unwined Dry Shampoo: This also works pretty well, but the scent is very very strong. Won’t be getting this one again. Can’t find this particular dry shampoo anymore (they have regular shampoo in this line, though).

DEBRIS

20201203_133936.jpg

Tippy Toes Baby Wipes: I use these to wipe off swatches or my hands. I will use wipes to clean up fall out under my eyes, but always have to apply a face oil afterwards. No matter how gentle the brand says it is, it’s always a bit drying on the face. The scent on these is awful, though. Maybe their unscented ones are better…?

Apagard Nano-Hydroxyapetite Toothpaste: I wanted to see if this stuff actually works. NAHA is an ingredient, created by NASA and sold to Japan, that helps build enamel in your teeth from the inside out (as opposed to fluoride which helps on the outer layer of the teeth). You can look up scientific papers on-line about it and why NASA created it, but Japan has been using it in their dental care since 1970 (I believe). And I’ll be damned if this stuff doesn’t work. My teeth are sensitive and if I don’t use sensitive toothpaste, they hurt like hell. NAHA helps with sensitivity by repairing micro-scratches or breeches in your enamel so now I don’t need sensitive specific toothpaste. How fucking cool is that?

Tom’s of Main Sensitive Toothpaste: This is what I used before I found that Apagard stuff (I’m also trying the Boka brand with the NAHA since I won’t want to have to wait to get the paste from Japan). It’s great stuff.

Native Natural Deodorants: Natural deodorants don’t work on me - and these are no exception. They actually make me sweat more. But I wanted to try this brand because so many people were singing its praises (and I got a coupon). So…yeah. Total bust. But it’s fine if I’m staying at home and not overexerting myself with anything. They smell really nice, too.


All righty. That wraps up my trash for 2020. Fingers crossed that 2021 will only have me talking about literal garbage instead of metaphorical.

fingers crossed dr horrible.gif


Morgue Drawer June 2018

Here we are again, folks. As the temperatures remain in the nineties, it feels safer to me to stay inside and write up a few blog posts/reviews. So let's start with my trash, eh?

 

AND SO....I DIE...

20180702_181718.jpg

These make me sad. There's still product in each container but either the formulas have changed, they smell off, or they tingle against my lips and they're not supposed to do that. So I need to trash them.

Medusa's Makeup Lip Paint Remover: This stuff works great on MM's lip paints but after a while, the smell got horrible and the cap is all sticky and crusty with dried oil. It's basically almond oil, grapeseed oil, and fragrance so I imagine just almond oil will work fine. But they're having a sale right now and it's half off! I might keep the bottle and reuse it for something else. (CF)

Elf Luscious Liquid Lipstick in Nude Pink: I love this color and the formula. It started out smelling like mint but now it smells like menthol so into the garbage it goes. Would totally buy again, though, if they still had this shade. Which they don't. (CF)

Colourpop Lippies: These are probably the oldest CP lippies I own so it makes sense that they smell funny now, or the formulas have changed and actually burn when I put them on. As I have a ton of other lipsticks and glosses, I don't NEED to repurchase. Doesn't mean I won't, though...(L to R) Ultra Glossy Lip in Tight Fit; Ultra Satin in So Wavy, Lost, Petit Four, and Marshmallow (Tight Fit, Lost, and Marshmallow are still available on the CP site). 

 

SCRUB-A-DUB AND SMELL GOOD

20180702_181817.jpg

Paul Mitchell Instant Moisture Conditioner: I've been enjoying a lot of Paul Mitchell products lately and the hubby loves this conditioner (and matching shampoo), too! It works pretty well to keep hair clean and moisturized, which is good for me since I bleach my hair now. I ended up buying the bigger size so hubs and I can share. (CF)

Phyto Color Enhancing Hair Mask: I got this sample with an Ulta order, I think. Though it worked really well (at least at moisturizing), it's not a Cruelty Free brand so I won't be purchasing it in the future. It's also $59 for 6 ounces. Uh...no. (NCF)

Purlisse Coconut Oil and Coffee Sugar Scrub: This was a decent scrub, smelled great, but I only got one use out of this sample size. You need to use a lot to cover the whole body (I did, anyway, and I'm not very big). (CF/Vegan)

Mitchum Stick Deodorant: This worked okay. I like the clear gel formula much better. Pretty sure any deodorant that isn't one of the 'natural' brands, isn't cruelty free. (NCF)

Nature's Truth Sweet Almond Oil: I like to use this on my feet and toenails after I shower. It's a nice, light oil, that absorbs quickly into the skin. Good for all over the body, actually. Almond oil is used as a base for other moisturizers because it has no scent. Will buy again (it's not all gone but I poured the remainder into an empty pump bottle for easier dispersement). (CF - ?)

Purple Cat Apothecary Body Butters: Two more from the 5-pack sample set I ordered. The Lemon Chiffon was divine! Lemon and butter cake. The Frostbloom was okay. Kinda floral, kinda minty...hard to pin down. This formula was much thicker and drier than the Lemon one but both worked very well, especially over the almond oil I talked about above. (CF) NOTE: This was originally an Etsy store with art and body products. Apparently, Etsy is making is difficult and more expensive for people to use it as a store front so this woman only has an on-line art store at a separate website. Dammit.

 

SQUEAKY CLEAN

20180702_182146.jpg

TN Dickinson's Witch hazel: I like to use this after I do a mud mask. It's great for cleaning off any excess or left behind product without drying out my skin. I know a lot of people hate the smell of witch hazel but it doesn't bother me at all. Very gentle and could be used every day. I think I got mine at the grocery store but it's sold everyone it seems. (CF/Vegan)

Everyone Lavender and Coconut Hand Soap: We've tried a few scents from this brand and I really have enjoyed them all. This and the Lemon/Mandarin one have been been my favorites. Great for the kitchen! (CF)

BBW Good Vibes Only foaming hand soap: I bought this scent to get a deal at Bath and Body Works so I wasn't expecting it to be great but I love it. Even the hubby, who's not one for a lot of scented cleansers, really liked it. But...because it's BBW, and they sell to China, I really have only been keeping my purchases to candles (I love their candles and haven't found anything else to replace them yet). (NCF)

 

 

CHOMPERS AND THE LIKE

20180702_182336.jpg

ACT Restoring Mouthwash: I used this stuff every day with Invisalign and now it's just a habit I can't quit. Which is good! My teeth need a lot of help so this fluoride rinse is perfect. Doesn't burn like a mo-fo, either. (NCF)

Tom's of Maine Maximum Strength Sensitive toothpaste: Love this stuff. Will keep buying. (CF)

Simply Creative Living Honey Cherry Almond lip balm: I believe I talked about another lip balm from this company. I got it at my city's Farmer's Market or the 4th of July fair. Can't remember. This was just okay. Probably won't repurchase. (CF)

 

ALL ABOUT THAT FACE

20180702_182525.jpg

NO:HJ Sheet Mask: Got this from my monthly subscription, Facestory. It was really nice and it had all these gold colored flowers all over it. I felt so fancy! It's a Korean brand so the cruelty free status is hard to know/confirm.

The Ordinary Buffet serum: I've raved about this product before here but lately, this stuff hasn't been working all that well. It's actually been breaking me out. I know skin can acclimate to a product, making it less effective, even develop reactions to some. Seems that's what's happened here. So while my backup bottles sit unused, I'm trying something else. I'll let you know how it goes. (CF)

Ole Henrickson Banana Bright Eye Cream: Got this in one of my last Ipsy bags, I think. The cream is yellow but not sure it's brightening. It's thick but doesn't absorb that well. In fact, it didn't really do shit. (CF)

SkinRX Labs MadeCera Cream: Another sample product but can't remember where I go it. I really enjoyed it, though. Felt great on the skin and did a good job of moisturizing. Again, SkinRX is Korean so can't confirm or deny cruelty free status.

Formula 10.0.6 Day/Night Cream: I've been using the day and night creams for a while. Still loving them. (CF)

 

ALL SORTS OF STUFF

20180702_182726.jpg

The Ordinary Fluid Primer (forgot to put this with the makeup): This stuff is pure shit. When I bought it, the bottle was barely half full (but it wasn't wet or sticky so nothing leaked - it just wasn't filled). Can't get it out of the bottle THROUGH the dropper so I'd just wipe off enough OFF the dropper to put on my face. And then I felt like a total grease ball. I can't even use it up because it feels so gross and my skin hates it. (CF)

Burt's Bees Cleansing Oil: I really like cleansing oils so I thought I'd give BB's version a shot. It's...okay. Smells a little weird and doesn't do a great job but it's fine. I actually didn't finish this yet but I put the remaining product in a travel bottle. (CF)

Nip + Fab Glycolic Cleansing Pads: I got a sample pack of these years ago when I was still getting the Walmart box. And I really liked them so I got this full size at the drug store. Turned out they didn't really do that much for my skin. But I like the travel friendly pre-soaked pads (as opposed to a bottle) even though these felt kind of dry. Maybe that's why they didn't seem to do much. I'd be willing to try them again, though, in case I got a bad batch. (CF)

Manyo Factory Herb Green Cleansing Oil: I'm pretty sure this sample was what started my love of cleansing oils. This stuff was great. Smelled good and did a great job of removing makeup, especially after the heavy stuff I use for convention appearances! It's another Korean brand so I don't know if they're cruelty free.

First Aid Beauty Hydrating Serum (not sure why I didn't put this with the previous stuff): I've used a couple products from this brand before and while I did like them, I don't feel the brand is so superb to be worth the higher price tag. I did really enjoy this, though. (CF)