The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

August Morgue Drawer Part II - Hair and Makeup

All righty. Ready for Part 2 of my Morgue Drawer reviews? Hold on to your panties because it’s hair and makeup time! 

First up: Hair

DevaCurl Shampoo and Conditioner: This came in a three pack with styling gel but I’m still trying that out. Step 1 is No-Poo Zero Lather hair cleanser and Step 2 is Hydrate Ultra Creamy conditioner. Meh. The no-poo cleanser smelled like poo (so I’m dubious of the name) but the conditioner smelled nice. Those alone didn’t define my curls - I think it was the styling gel. Looks like 3 ounces is $9 for each so I’ll skip it.

Hask Argan Oil from Morocco Repairing Shampoo and Conditioner: I got sample packets of these on two separate occasions and loved them both times. Not really sure if they repaired anything but they smell so yummy. Like fresh oranges! $6 for 12 ounces? Yes, please!

Giovanni 2 Chic Blackberry and Coconut Oil Hair Serum: This was another sample from Ulta and though I don’t get any blackberry from it, it smells like heaven, if heaven was filled with sweet coconuts. The oil really helps smooth the frizziness in my hair but be careful. If you use too much (for me that’s more than the size of an aspirin) your hair will look greasy. I’ve already purchased the full size (2.75 ounces for $8).

Marc Anthony Oil of Morocco Hair Spray: LOVE this stuff. It’s lightweight but feels like it gives me enough control over my hair style (you know, what little styling I actually do with my mop). Smells fantastic. Already repurchased the travel size and the regular 8.8 ounce can ($9 at Ulta, sometimes $7 at Walgreens). You can’t buy it at their site but there’s a store locator option.


Next up: MAKE UP!!

Aveeno Ultra-Calming Makeup Wipes: Meh. They smell very nice but I don’t feel they removed my makeup all that well. Which doesn’t make me ultra-calm either. You can get them for about $7 at retailers all over but only if you want to.

It’s Skin Mangowhite Lip/Eye Makeup Remover Wipes: I loved these. They smell really nice and the cloths are super soft. They did a really good job of removing makeup, too. I got these in a 3B box so you’ll have to get them on-line at a Korean market or Ebay. I’ve seen prices between $5-$10.

Vivito Dressin Solution Lip/Eye Makeup Remover: Not too happy with this one. It’s an oil based mixture that you need to shake before applying. The oil doesn’t bother me because those removers never pull at the skin around my eyes and hydrate while cleaning. But the bottle leaked when it arrived (in a Meme box) and it didn’t do that great of a job. Smelled nice though. Had a hard time finding their site for info. Don’t trust my conversion method but I think this goes for about $13 USD.

Benefit Porefessional Face Primer: I’ve only ever received teeny samples of this that are only good for one time use (and I got the samples twice and I STILL don’t know if it's any good). It seems like a formula that would work well for me and it didn’t break me out the two times I’ve used it. But I can’t really get a reading on its performance. And at $31 for .75 ounces I may never know. Since it’s not necessary to use a lot of product at once, I know many people buy the travel size for $10 (which I think you can only get at places like Ulta or Sephora - not at the Benefit store) and it lasts forever. So I might give that a shot someday.

Physicians Formula Sexy Booster VaVaVoom Volumizing Mascara: I normally like most of PF mascaras. The ‘Organic’ line is not drying or harsh on my lashes, which are getting older and drier and a little more sparse. Great substitute for the discontinued Cover Girl Natureluxe mascara Though the packaging on this is gorgeous, the formula left a lot to be desired and the product dried up in just a few weeks. Lame.

Maybelline Master Precise Liquid Liner: Maybelline has been pissing me off lately. A lot of their products have been complete failures for me. Though I like the felt tip precision of this liner, it smudged and faded easily (damn my oily eyelids) and the pen dried up way too fast. Won’t be wasting $8 on this again.


There you have it. All the crap I went through over the past few months. Hope the mini reviews help some of you out. If not, well at least it’s not rattling around in my brain anymore. I’ll be back in a few months for another morgue drawer cleaning.