The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: Steve Bejma

Universal Yums November 2016

Yeah, yeah. It's already December. But I don't get this one until later in the month so deal with it. It also gave me some time to eat stuff!

For those who may not know, Universal Yums is a monthly subscription service of FOOD. Each month, for $13 or $25, you'll get a box of delicious snacks from around the world. Check them out here: UNIVERSAL YUMS

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

November brings us INDONESIA! Here's a little trivia for you. Answer at the end of the post. Indonesia experiences at least one of these everyday. A. Earthquakes; B. Hurricanes; C. Typhoons; D. Volcanic Eruptions

Tic Tac Spicy Crackers: Haven't tried these yet even though the card assures me they're not THAT spicy. That's more the hubby's thing. But they look fun. Who doesn't like spicy balls?

Superstar Triple Chocolate Wafer: SOOOPER excited for this. Again, we haven't tried it yet but it looks awesome. Chocolate wafers with chocolate filling covered in chocolate. Um, yes please.

Choki Choki Choco Cashew Spread: I just tried this yesterday. Think what a rich chocolate bar feels like when it's mostly melted and that's what you've got in a tube. The cashew adds an awesome flavor with the chocolate. So much better than Nutella (which I know is hazelnut but I'm trying to give you an idea of what this is).

Richeese Rolls: These are like those rolled wafer cookies filled with some kind of sweet creme but in these you get Swiss cheese. Not really a Swiss fan so I might skip this one.

Momogi Keju Cheese Stick: More Swiss cheese? Apparently it's not the taste but the shape of this snack that makes it interesting. Um, that's not really selling me on it. We'll see...

Barley Mint Candy: Very interesting mint candy. The barley gives a surprisingly complementary flavor to the mint. I know it sounds weird but it really works.

Beng Beng Chocolate Bar: Pretty sure this was the first thing we ate from this box. It's very similar to the $100,000 Bar we've got here: chocolate covered caramel and rice krispies except this one didn't seem overly sweet, if that's possible. Yummy!

Roast Corn Cheetos: First I thought, "Cheetos? Really?". But these were not a disappointment. Taste like roasted sweet corn with the familiar crunch of Cheetos. SOOOO GOOOD!

Nano Nano Sweet & Sour Candy: The booklet says it's sweet and sour. The package says sweet and tangy. I don't know what the hell this stuff is. They're little hard candies, individually wrapped, but I have no fucking idea what the flavor it's supposed to be! Not bad but not really good either. The orange is very subtle but the other flavor is...?? I got Cup of Soup. The new friend GLAHW made at Steel City, Jarrod, got cucumber. Don and Steve couldn't really quite place it. MontiLee didn't know what to make of it either. But there are two packages of it in this box so I'll give it another go...maybe...

That's it for November. Stay tuned for what we think will be Germany in December!

Trivia Answer: A. Earthquakes. Indonesia had 897 of them in the past year.

PDs, GFYs, and MEHs - May/June Edition(s)

Ah, that's such a better title than "Monthly Favorites", isn't it? Well, it's more ME anyway. As I'm so far behind in my reviews (damn you, sinus infection!) I thought I'd better combine May and June to get caught up a bit. So this might be a long list but I tried to include other stuff besides makeup! And I think I left out a few things because if I didn't, we'd be here all fucking week.

So let's begin, shall we?

First let's look at the Panty Droppers.

Gerard Cosmetics Lip Gloss in Bahama. I put a picture on my Instagram a while back when I first tried on this gloss. Normally I wouldn't pay $19 for a lip gloss but I got a coupon code from MannyMUA on YouTube (btw, you should check out his channel - he's adorable and looks prettier in make-up than most women I know) to get two lip products for $20. And when the lipsticks go for $24 and the glosses $19, it's kind of a no brainer there. This gloss was more like a liquid lipstick. It is so pigmented and absolutely gorgeous. I never though I'd wear a color like this but I do now. It even stains my lips so when the gloss wears off, there's still a soft lavender color left behind. It's awesome.

I don't remember how I found ZOMG Smells but it's an indy perfume company run by two women. I know one of them has gone back to school recently so the ordering process is backed up about 3 months but they are SO worth the wait. I love sweet and food smelling perfumes and these gals knock it out of the park with almost everything I've ordered (they make all sorts of smells - not just food). Sugar Dragon is my favorite so far and it smells like cherries and vanilla. *dies* *is ded*  You can order several different sizes, from their sample squees (1 ml vial) to an 8 ml sized bottle. The Squee Party allows you to order 10 samples for about $30 and it's a fantastic way to try new scents. 

BH Cosmetics Contour Palette: I normally don't buy high end make up. But when something that's costs $20 goes on sale at Haute Look for half that price, and I've wanted to try it out, I'll go ahead and purchase it. That's what happened with this palette. I don't contour. I'm too fucking lazy for that shit. I wanted to try the powders and the blushes, though. The yellow and brown powders are dead to me but the peachy undertone one (lower left) is perfect to set under my eyes and helps cancel out the dark blue I have there. The blushes are so pigmented you have to be REALLY careful when applying. Both colors are gorgeous and not QUITE as bright - but swatches always show up a lot heavier. The white powder may not do much for super pale people but on me it does work as soft highlighter and under eye brightener. I included the picture with the pen so you could understand the size of this bitch. I thought it was much smaller but happily, it's not. You get a lot of product here! (the swatches are backwards - they both go from right to left, top row on top, bottom row on bottom - sorry about that!)

Deadworld Soda. Dear gods this stuff is awesome! It's a pop created by Caprice Brands based on the comic, Deadworld. I've only tried the Orange and Vanilla Rootbeer and it's probably a good thing I'm so lazy because I'd be running to the store every week to replenish my supply. My friends, Steven Bejma and Don England, created the artwork for the bottles you see above (Steve on the Orange and Don on the Root Beer. Another buddy and GLAHW member, Joshua Werner, also did artwork for the Orange soda but I don't have one of those...*sad trombone*). They are sold are various locations in Michigan so go find some! Now!

And now for the Go Fuck Yourselves

Remember last month when I bitched about the Revlon Colorburst Lacquer Balm or whatever the fuck it was? That I probably wouldn't buy another one? Well, I couldn't really judge the shittiness of the product based on one sampling of it so of course, I went out and bought another one. And immediately regretted it. The swatch on my hand looks really nice but again, it's patchy on the lips (not as bad as the pink one last time) and it wore off within 30 minutes. Complete waste of money. Don't bother purchasing this.

Luckily I just had the one really bad product. For the MEHs...

When I first started using the Rimmel Perfection Match 2-in-1 Concealer, I though it was perfect. It did a great job of canceling out my purple under eye and the creamy consistency was easy to blend. But it's not that great of a concealer on blemishes and when I use it on the redness around my nose, it sinks into my pores and accentuates them. Looks terrible. So it's okay for one use and not so okay for another. Hence the meh rating. I can keep working with it for now. I haven't tried it as a highlighter, like it says on the package, so maybe...?

I was going to put all of these in the GFY category but felt it wasn't fair. These products get rave reviews from a lot of other people out there so maybe it's just me. The Maybelline Color Tattoo cream eyeshadows do not like my oily lids. The colors are nice but don't have much staying power, even if you put powder over them. The Revlon Rose Glow highlighter was straight up glitter. I don't mind glitter at all but if that's all that shows up on my skin, with no color tone to back it up, it goes in the garbage. The Maybelline Master Highlight was glittery, too, but I thought it was going to have a mauve color (the color is called Mauve so go figure). It was more rose gold (like super yellow gold) that looked TERRIBLE on me. It was also very powdery and made a total mess. The Babyface Blusher was such a disappointment. It's a lovely lavender shade in the pan but it didn't even show up on my skin! So sad...I think you'd have to be super pale, maybe translucent, for this to be visible on the skin.

That should do for now. I think I'm going to cover a lot more non-make up stuff for next month. At least, I'm going to try! I hope you use the links provided to check out some of the great stuff I found this month (or last month or whatever). Let me know if you do and what you think!