The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Universal Yums October 2016 Review

Again, I missed a month (or possibly two) but I'm back on the Review Wagon with October's Universal Yums box. We just got the November one but since we hadn't opened October yet, I figured I wouldn't skip it! November will be coming soon...

For those who may not know, Universal Yums is a monthly subscription service. For $13 (or $25) you get a box of candy and snacks from a different country each month. Check them out here: UNIVERSAL YUMS

October brings us goodies from RUSSIA! Trivia Time: Which country is still fighting WWII with Russia? 1. USA; 2. GERMANY; 3. JAPAN; 4. ITALY (answer at the bottom of the post)

(I'll go left to right, top to bottom)

3 Korochki Holodets: These aren't true holodets, which are cold meat jellies (ugh) but the flavor of these little crunchy niblets is of the traditional Russian dish. They start off tasting like straight up roast beef! Then they take a weird turn toward "what the fuck" then veer back to regular meat. Then skip off the road again. Very strange yet pleasant and bewildering.

Ruzik Vanilla Corn Puffs: Think Corn Pop cereal but with a texture of a regular cheesy poof. The vanilla coating on these are more powdery than smooth and they taste sweeter than regular corn pops. They are pretty awesome!

3 Korochki Salmon &Cheese: Haven't opened these yet but as they're made by the same people that did the holodets one, I'm thinking they're the same type of snack. I'm a little afraid...

Skazochnly Strawberry Sponge Cake: Saving this one for the hubby because apparently it tastes like strawberry short cake and he loves that stuff! It does have a nice give to it when I squeeze it so I'm hoping it's nice and moist and tastes good!

Blackcurrant Candies: The description says they're chewy but they feel like little rocks. I anticipate the flavor will be awesome, though, so it doesn't really matter!

Mikaello Chocolate Covered Apricot w/Walnut: This is the flattened empty wrapper above. It was DELICIOUS. It does have a bit of a weird aftertaste but I think all apricots are like that! The textures of dried fruit, nuts, and chocolate were wonderful together.

Russkoe Chocolate w/Sunflower Seeds & Cranberry: Haven't tried this one yet but it sounds pretty good. 

Rot Front Chocolate Vanilla Candy: Don't let the 'rot' name fool you. I thought these tasted good - and very unique. It might be the crushed waffles that make the flavor kind of odd but I liked them. The consistency is sort of like the middle of a butterfinger but not so crunchy. Melts nicely in the mouth!

Red October Toffee Krepysh: Not sure if I'll try this one because it feels rather stiff which usually translates to super sticky which translates to missing dental work. And yes, this company name comes from Lenin's 1917 government takeover. Thought they don't make military rations anymore, it's still government owned and makes the most popular candy in Russia. Of course, I'm guessing if you don't agree with that assessment...

That covers everything. We got a lot of stuff this month and I'm excited to try the few things we haven't opened yet. Until next time....

TRIVIA: 3. JAPAN. Neither Russia nor Japan have signed a peace treaty with each other after WWII. They're still fighting over a piece of land called the Kuril Islands in the southern part of Russia/northern part of Japan.